As Daylight dies
As Daylight dies, originally uploaded by P_mod.
Posted by AgentRusco on August 24th, 2010 at 10:00 am
As Daylight dies, originally uploaded by P_mod.
submitted by Francesco Paolo Catalano, the photographer and model.
An altered Self Portrait to speak about homophobia and transgenderphobia.
This self portrait is part of photographic project about gender and queer theory.
Jennikins wrote…
I’m a female-bodied queer who dresses in mostly woman-assigned clothes and who usually feels like my queerness and my gender variability gets lost in the presentation I feel comfortable with. Today a friend whom I’ve never talked to about gender told me, “I know you’re not butch, but I really don’t think of you as all woman. You’ve definitely got a masculine streak to you.” I think it’s the best compliment I’ve ever gotten from someone I’ve only known for a month.
What’s your experience?
Let’s talk about how awesome you are.
Yesterday I offered up the Facebook “like” button — a way of showing that you like a post without needing to leave a comment. Then, responding to some associated suggestions, I offered a thumbs-up feature for comments, to let you show when you like them, too. That feature came bundled with a thumbs-down feature, and I asked if that might be useful for letting you guys give “hey, that wasn’t cool” feedback on comments when you feel the need. After some conversations, I added in a way to create threaded replies to comments, so you can respond to them directly. Then I asked you all to vote on which ones to keep. It all happened quickly, and if you missed it, I apologize — you can still weigh in. But here’s what happened:
You UNANIMOUSLY rejected the “thumbs down” button. That was a firm, undeniable, “HELL NO.” You don’t want a tool that has the potential to create drama and bad feelings.
And you had mixed feelings about the comment and post “like” buttons. On one hand, it’s nice to be able to show support. On the other hand, vote counts can be used as part of a popularity game, and that smells a bit icky. And you don’t want people to feel encouraged to comment less — you love reading the comments here. Also? Looking more like facebook? Not so great.
BUT! You do pretty much love the ability to reply to comments directly, and that gives you a way to support great comments that you didn’t have before. So loud and clear: that feature stays. The rest… well, it’s probably better if the rest go.
So the verdict is in. Genderfork says NO to drama. And for that, I am wildly in love with you. Thank you.
I’ll leave you with some of my favorite quotes from the discussion:
When the comments rating was first mentioned I thought it might be a good idea (and I still see its merits), but in practice I’m not happy with it — it makes the site feel a bit like all those “who’s the best, who’s at the top, let’s have lots of rankings and rate and number everything” and takes away from the feel of personality[? not sure if that’s the word] and hospitality; maybe that’s just me tho?
– tigr
I much agree! I feel as though the like/dislike feature has the potential to unwittingly become a popularity contest of sorts.
If threading stays, however, it’d be easy to reply with a quick “So do I!” or “I feel the same way!” instead of the little thumbs up/thumbs down that can be interpreted any number of ways and may alienate some of genderforkers. That would eliminate like/dislike and tidy up the comments, making the conversations within them more coherent.
-Dorian
I don’t like the idea of any sort of “thumbs down” or “dislike” button becuase one of the things I value so much about Genderfork is how positive we are able to stay.
-Avery
no dislike button. it will create hate, drama, and overall negative feelings in an overall supportive community
-mEEsh
I just have to say, I’m really not loving this. I really enjoyed the simplicity of Genderfork, and it was my get away from my Facebook/non accepting people.
– anonymous
Hhmmmm, i really like the threaded comments, it adds something to the comments that is beneficial to the flow of conversation. But the thumbs up/thumbs down, in my mind doesn’t. I also love the fact that genderfork isn’t negative, and having the option for thumbs down-ing something just doesn’t seem right for here…..
– freiya
“I feel like I should say that Genderfork is the ONLY place on the wider internet (i.e. besides blogs of friends) where I seek out & enjoy reading the comments. everywhere else, I inevitably regret reading comments… it just makes me feel gross & debased, and lose more faith in my fellow humans. Here, the comments are half to two-thirds of what make the site awesome.
In other words, you all rule!”
– jean c.
It’s true. You totally do.
Thanks and love,
Sarah Dopp
founder of genderfork
, originally uploaded by K?te McL?ren www.kate-mclaren.com.
You can call me… KJ.
I identify as… a female-bodied boy with girl disposition.
As far as third-person pronouns go, … I typically get “she” and “her,” but I get this great, euphoric (and borderline frightened) rush when those of the “he/him” variety are used.
I’m attracted to… people. However, I’m way gravitated toward women; those who can hold an intelligent conversation without being discriminatory. I tend to form lasting relationships with those who are like-minded and open.
When people talk about me, I want them to… remember that I, too, am merely human. Anyone can put on a tough face, a happy face, a sad one. I’m essentially an open book if you actually hold a conversation with me, instead of about me. Just ask, you won’t regret it.
I want people to understand… that I’m like a clock. Who would have known that the inside was THAT cool? The outside is whatever. You can dress it up, dress it down. One day, I could be that weird cat one with the shifting eyes—the next, some gentleman’s golden pocket watch. Any way you look at it, those gears are gonna keep whirring… going about their business the same way they’ve been doing since it’s creation.
About KJ
second year at USC, you know me: that kid with the lisa frank type jacket and the hot girlfriend.
» Define yourself. «
submitted by Dinah, the model.
“I’ve never thought of myself concretely as a “she” as far as inner dialogue goes, although I’ve stopped short of thinking of myself as a male. My “I don’t know what makes a person male or female” thought could be simple disdain for gender roles, and it could also be denial and repression of myself as a gender variant person. Whoooo am I?!!! For now, I think of myself as a female-bodied person who lives with disregard for heteronormative standards of femininity. But maybe that’s because they don’t apply to me… if you catch my drift, ha. :) “
Hey Everyone,
You can probably see that a facebook “like” button just showed up on all our posts (at least, if you’re viewing at http://www.genderfork.com directly, it did). People have asked for ways to show they like something without having to leave a full comment. Facebook’s solution is kinda interesting because it lets you see which of your friends have liked it, but doesn’t show the identities of people who aren’t your friends on Facebook.
So… keep it or kill it? Do you like the Facebook solution? Or is just adding clutter?
Tell me below.
Thanks!
Sarah
p.s. if you’re looking to expand your facebook-based genderforkian community, try chiming in on the conversations over here: http://www.facebook.com/genderfork
EDIT: We’re ALSO now talking about a like/dislike rating system on comments now. See comment discussion on this post for more details.
POLL TIME!: Weigh in with your votes below, here:
[Image source: Whitezine]
Someone wrote…
I’ve finally realized that my gender isn’t something I have to “find” inside myself. If I’m capable of thinking of myself as genderqueer, that’s probably proof enough that I am.
What’s your experience?
kypri recommends…
This is a stop-motion video of Edward Vigiletti, a beautiful young man, putting on his makeup and transforming into a beautiful young woman. He has been referred to as the male Lady Gaga, and I can see why. He’s beautiful and androgynous without the makeup, too.
155 Thu Jul 1st 2010, originally uploaded by Violet Lilith.
A reader asks…
Does anyone have a preferred gender-neutral honorific, à la “Sir” and “Ma’am”?
Please post your response in the comments below.
» Ask Genderfork «
Male Model Luke Worrall 07, originally uploaded by Alternatives for Men.
Someone wrote…
I want to be more thin and lean partly because I want to appear more androgynous. But it’s fucked up that I associate thinness with androgyny.
What’s your experience?
The 30th anniversary of the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence in Dolores Park, San Francisco. (“Who?“)
Androgynous Alien, originally uploaded by Anna Eva.
You can call me… Alex.
I identify as… a straight guy, with some assembly required… Transgender FTM.
As far as third-person pronouns go, … masculine. He/His/Him. Thankfully most friends have picked up on it. (Mom doesn’t know and Dad won’t do it.) If you mess up, it’s cool…just don’t make a big deal out of it.
I’m attracted to… MY GIRLFRIEND! She is THE most amazing, beautiful, AND supportive person! She has really helped me a lot with starting my transition (she even let me use her name to register my Visa gift card that I was going to use to get my binder… AND let me ship it there… She is ALSO going to order my packer for me!) Another thing: she refers to me as her boyfriend and only a few people know that I’m actually trans!
When people talk about me, I want them to… Not ONLY talk about me being trans. To me, it’s not that big of a deal. Yes it’s a big part of my life right now, but that’s because I’m starting my transition. I don’t just want to be “‘That transguy…Alex” for the rest of my life.
I want people to understand… that this is who I am. It’s NOT an impulse decision. I’ve wanted to be a guy for as long as I can remember. I may still be kinda young but I know this is what I want. Also, it’s not other people’s jobs to inform others about me being trans. I should have the decision of who knows…and who doesn’t.
About Alex
I asked my girlfriend what to put here; she said:
“hi, im alex. im fucking amazing. thats all you really need to know.”
My version:
Alex. 17. Starting college at University of Central Missouri Jan 10, 2010 (finished High School Oct. 5th, 2009).
Criminal Justice major, Psych minor.
I have THE most amazing girlfriend.
I CAN’T WAIT to start T and physically become the guy I truly am.
» Define yourself. «