Question: My Ideal Body.

DiNERO asks…

So, I’m thinking about getting top surgery… The only thing is I won’t be on T. I pass enough without it. (I don’t consider myself FTM, I’m just REALLY GenderQueer)

Has anyone on here ever gone through with this medical procedure or even knows someone who has? What was the experience like during and after? What should I expect?

Will my brand new chest turn out the same way someone on T would? (with proper nutrition and weight training — well-developed muscular pecs)

Please post your response in the comments below.

» Ask Genderfork «


Posted by on January 21st, 2010 at 04:00 pm

Category: questions 15 comments »

15 Responses to “Question: My Ideal Body.”

  1. Anonymous

    Are you me? I could have asked this question. How do you think your family/friends would react to you getting surgery but not considering yourself FTM? The idea worries me, sometimes.

    [Reply]

  2. Corbyn

    I can tell you that unless you have a very small chest then it won’t do the same thing as nutrition and weight training. I am a very big weight and power lifter and that has actually made my boobs more prominent (much to displeasure) even with a binder.
    I haven’t had surgery but I do know there are limitations are arm movements for a little bit and what not. But there are some great websites that have a lot of info on the surgery:
    FORGE
    http://ftmichael.transboys.info/topsurgery.html
    Also if you even just google it there are many websites that talk about it and peoples’ experience with it.

    [Reply]

  3. Chris

    Firstly, I like the “i’m not FTM, I’m just REALLY genderqueer.” I’m the same way. But I can’t pass, like, ever. I want to be on T, but I don’t want top surgery. It’s cool you can pass as a man without T.

    Secondly, In response to the first comment about how your family might react, you could either not tell them, or tell them about how wearing binders over a long period of time is dangerous, and you want to fit into your sexy guy clothes better ;)

    In Canada, you have to be diagnosed with GID before you’re considered for surgery, which is optional, just like hormones are optional too.

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  4. QueerAsa3$BillinaDress

    I’m getting ready for top surgery soon and not now (nor probably ever) going on T. As far as surgery goes, when you are healing you’re not supposed to lift anything or move strenuously for a pretty long time after surgery so that your body can heal properly. A lot of people try to build up muscle before surgery so that the surgeon can reconstruct your chest based on your body at your ideal fitness level. That can be done with or without T or other hormones, it takes some discipline and consistent exercise. Just make sure if you decide to lift weights that you start gradually and have someone who knows weights show you how to go about training without over-doing it and hurting yourself.

    You also want to do a lot of research about different surgeons because they all do it a little differently and therefore have different results (some focus more on aesthetics/appearance: contour, scarring, etc; some focus more on maintaining sensation: nipples especially; some specialize on folks starting with a larger chest, some only do keyhole and only operate on smaller chested folks…basically read up and decide what is most important to you). Some surgeons (depending where you are, I’ve heard of it being a problem in Nebraska) may not be ok with you not being on T, so you want to make sure you find that out early. Most surgeons will still do top surgery without hormones, but it can be a nasty shock to find that out late in the process.

    There are a lot of excellent resources online but its always best to try and talk to people who have actually been through it.

    As far as talking to family about it, it is going to totally depend on your family. Some of my family totally understands the genderqueer thing and my moms are very supportive about surgery (they want me to come and recuperate at their house so they can take care of me). But some people aren’t going to get it and some are going to try really hard to fit you into a transgender/FTM kind of box to try and understand. It will probably be frustrating no matter what, and it is always a process, but sometimes people can surprise you with how much they actually can “get it” and understand. You have to make that call for yourself.

    Also, there are some great online tools for helping people educate themselves when you’ve had it with trying to explain everything to people who don’t even have the basic vocabulary to talk about gender.

    [Reply]

  5. Firebolt

    Wow! I could have asked this exact same question. I’m also very genderqueer and want to have surgery for my pretty big chest someday. Although, I’m torn between top surgery and drastic breast reduction. My babyface lets me pass as a boy and I have no intention of going on T as of now.

    As for family, well, mine is going to be a bigger problem because I live in India and the very idea of my being a dyke may turn out to be quite horrifying to them. First I’ll have to get through explaining my sexuality and later on progress to explaining gender identity. I don’t think they will be happy at all about the surgery, though.

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  6. Adisson -Sheik-

    If you go on youtube, you can find plenty vids of kids who have had top surgery. a few names off the top of my head, ANFJace, ThatsWhatZeSaid, Skylarkeleven, DominoAyeJay, DuplicateKeys and freshlycharles have all had top surgery done. Jace just got his done a few days ago.

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  7. Anonymous

    Wow. I genuinely never thought there’d be others that felt the same way!

    The idea of being completely flat-chested worries me in the social sense though. it would be a step further from just gender expression as to an extent it’d be blurring my biological sex anatomy..then what happens when society does force us to choose a gender binary, i.e. on forms…or toilets, etc?
    I think I’d need more courage :(

    Best of luck with everything :)

    [Reply]

  8. Idgie

    I’m broad shouldered with average boobs and like to wear bib overalls and flannel shirts most of the time. Don’t want to identify as EITHER, prefer BOTH. :)

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  9. JT

    I’m genderqueer, not on T and had top surgery 2 months ago. My family took it pretty well and I’m totally happy with the results. I worked out my chest before surgery and I’m slowly getting back into pushups and weights now.

    [Reply]

    RJ replied:

    Hey Jt I would be interested in emailing about surgery without t if you have a moment can you email me? Rjdarrow@gmail.com
    Thanks
    RJ

    [Reply]

  10. K2C

    I’m in the same boat! I really don’t have interest in doing testosterone, mostly because hormones really affect me negatively (I was briefly on different kinds of birth control, and they made me a crazy person). But I am dead certain I want chest surgery, I’ve even already told my family. They told me to “think about it”, but I know that in a few years when I have the money I’m definitely getting it, I already know what surgeon I want to go to.

    If you really pay attention to your nutrition and work out diligently, you shouldn’t have any problems with developing a male contoured chest. Transoutlaw on Youtube had chest surgery long before ze started doing T, because ze were determined not to. Ze did eventually, but ze have videos of their chest prior to using testosterone and hir chest was very traditionally masculine prior to that. Good luck!

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  11. athula

    Having a beautiful and perfect body is a dream of many men and women. Achieving and maintaining an ideal body gives attractive personality, self confidence, attraction towards the opposite sex and what’s more it attracts the prospective partner just like that.

    We cannot just say “The way I look is what I am” and ignore what others say or feel about our appearance. More than half of our body features can be perfected to be the part of an ideal body. Over ninety percent of the body features could be at least improved. Therefore we need not feel low and rejected. Usually what happens is we give up even without a try. Rather than being lazy and feel rejected is better to give a try and be satisfied with the outcome.

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  12. Cameron

    Im in a similar situation. I identify as genderqueer, and have been trying to get on tract to getting top surgery. The only problem has been finding a therapist who can put in the request form.

    [Reply]

  13. RJ

    I always want to see other folks who have had surgery and NOT on hormones I hav looked into this for a long time. If anyone is interested in talking about this email me rjdarrow@gmail.com I am on YouTube and searched it but it’s hard to find.

    [Reply]

  14. chi

    hello ii consider myself ftm..but like you i had top surgery, but never went on T. mainly because of some “side effects” i didnt like. i can pass as a guy but people confuse me for a young kid ..im 27 , its because im part asain
    ?lol dont eorry about not being on T. i had it done and my chest turend out fine…you have to keep exercising and eating good to maintain after though. make sure they do grafting of the nipples cause i think it makes the chest look better than the other way “keyhole method” and can leave you with extra loose skin under the nipples.

    [Reply]


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