The best compliment.

Jennikins wrote…

I’m a female-bodied queer who dresses in mostly woman-assigned clothes and who usually feels like my queerness and my gender variability gets lost in the presentation I feel comfortable with. Today a friend whom I’ve never talked to about gender told me, “I know you’re not butch, but I really don’t think of you as all woman. You’ve definitely got a masculine streak to you.” I think it’s the best compliment I’ve ever gotten from someone I’ve only known for a month.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?

Posted by on August 24th, 2010 at 08:00 am

Category: your voice 8 comments »

8 Responses to “The best compliment.”

  1. Samson

    Rock on! I’m also female-bodied and since I have boobs and androgynous-to-femme-ish clothing, I usually feel the same way about my genderqueerness getting “lost” on others. It’s nice when people pick up on it.


  2. A

    Man, same here! I am a poor student and I cannot afford to buy a whole new wardrobe, so I feel like my queerness is invisible. It’s such a delight when people notice, or even when my friends mention it. One of my guy friends called me a “typical male” the other day, and I almost died of happiness. Even though I’m not trans, it’s great to have my gender-variance recognized. =)


  3. Milo

    I found this via genderfork’s tumblr and reblogged it because I identify with this SOOOOooOOOooooooo much youdontevenknow.

    THEN I came here and saw that it’s actually quoted from a friend of mine. Small fucking world. <333


  4. Me

    Sometimes I post on fashion blog/network websites, and when people say I look too “costumey” I translate that into “you look like a drag queen,” so I take it as an affirmation that I’m doing something right, despite the female reproductive organs I was born with.


    Null replied:

    LOL, me too. I once had someone tell me I was a great cross-dresser and “more beautiful than a bio girl” even though I am one. XD Win!


  5. Janus

    I just had a similar talk with a friend last night, and it really made me appreciate that the people I surround myself with understand me in ways I never knew they would.


  6. Simon

    My friend, the other day, being completely serious and not meaning to offend called me a “boy, girl or whatever it is that you are.” Since she’s only been told that I’m a lesbian it completely made my day.


  7. Cydne

    I’m too afraid of being bullied, or laughed at, I think. When I want to be especially feminine, I’m afraid to wear certain things because I think I look silly because I’m a few pounds overweight. When I want to look especially masculine, I’m afraid that the assholes in the stupid conservative town I live in will bully me. So I just wear jeans and a T-shirt all the time.

    So I totally feel this. I love when people notice the real me, outside of my comfortable presentation.


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