Why would I pretend to be a macho man?

Someone wrote…

As a trans male who is expected to shed his femininity while transitioning, I was still delighted yesterday when my dad offered to paint my nails, and I love him for encouraging me to stay true to both my masculine and feminine sides. Why would I pretend to be a macho man when my biggest male role model growing up was the one who taught me how to walk in heels?

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?

Posted by on May 31st, 2010 at 08:00 am

Category: your voice 13 comments »

13 Responses to “Why would I pretend to be a macho man?”

  1. Milo

    Amazing! It’s nice that your dad’s like that.


  2. Simon

    This makes me so happy.


  3. Rebekah

    Your dad sounds awesome.


  4. Anonymous

    This made me smile. :)


  5. Eddy

    Wow, that’s awesome! You must have a great dad.


  6. Bubblegum Blues

    That’s a sweet story! Your dad sounds like a great guy.


  7. Me

    I think my heart just burst from the warm and fuzzies.


  8. Lauren

    Oh my this is so adorable.


  9. Jessica

    Kudos to your dad. The real test is whether when he gives you a hug he pats you on the back three times and then lets you go. Just joking.

    I do feel sorry for people who feel as hemmed in by convention in their adopted persona as they did in their birth persona. Be who you are and change whatever that is when you want to.

    Your story reminds me of walking in on my son while we was entwined with a women friend. I was embarrassed. He said, “What’s wrong, did you think I was gay?” I replied, “No, I thought you were Joseph.”


  10. Lexi

    This is amazing.


  11. Jarvis

    I learned how to paint my nails and do eye liner from the goth boys at my Catholic high school 2 years before my medical transition started.

    Fawk the binary.


  12. Ark

    I learned how to apply makeup from a guy, actually. Every time I would ask my mom she’d freak out, and asking my dad was out of the question. He stills makes stupid comments about me liking that kind of thing only because “of the female in you.”

    I’m going to try to not box myself in so much. People see me as female, whether or not I really look that way or am really that way- but what’s the point of avoiding stereotypically feminine things just because other people may think that’s “proof” I’m female? I mean sure, if I was more manly looking I could pull off a Glambert… but I’m not. So who said I couldn’t dress up like that? I’m honestly wondering how I could look enough like both things to be comfortable. I’ve found that my clothes and hair are the worst to work with (I have no idea where to start). I’m gonna have to do something… I freaking let my facial hair grow (OMG taboo for people around me).

    I actually got away with it until my dad bought his new glasses. Oh well, he can’t ignore it now. :P


  13. Jessica

    @Ark “Oh, yes, actually I do work for a circus.” is one of my favorite lines when I am faced with disbelieving people who want to to me in the “right” box.


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