Profile: Ryan/Rachel

You can call me… Ryan. Or Rachel. I’ve never really been called Rachel, but fantasize about that sometimes.

I identify as… Anarchist, pacifist, feminist, genderqueer, vegan. I’m a mess. I love my penis very much, but I seethe inside when people call me a man (or dude or bro). I’m not a man, but not quite a woman either. Some days feel more androgynous than others. Some days are perfect for wearing a skirt, sometimes just pants will do. Proud to live in Tucson, ashamed to live in Arizona.

As far as third-person pronouns go, … Everyone I know uses “he/him,” which I don’t mind. Sometimes I sort of fantasize about being a “she/her” or “ze/hir” but it hasn’t happened before and probably won’t until I learn how to express myself correctly.

I’m attracted to… Masculine women, feminine women, genderqueer females, trans women, genderqueer males, drag queens. I love someone who has any artistic passion and can engage in a good discussion on radical politics. Someone assertive who loves themselves. Someone who is sexually autonomous but appreciates my sexual being.

When people talk about me, I want them to… realize that I’m just a human being… No better or worse than they are. And I may be androgynous, but I’m not asexual ;)

Every person should also realize that I love them all <3

I want people to understand… that I’m simply not a man. I hate that my body makes it awkward for some of my friends to hear me say “I love you.” Gender is not at all a genetic given, and perhaps we all lose a bit of our being when we pigeonhole ourselves in one category or the other.

About Ryan/Rachel
This world sucks. Let’s change it :)

» Define yourself. «

Posted by on February 10th, 2011 at 08:00 am

Category: profiles 11 comments »

11 Responses to “Profile: Ryan/Rachel”

  1. Mardee

    This may be over simplification but do bear with me. Try introducing yourself as Rae. This is an acceptable diminutive for Rachel, suitably androgynous and may leave them guessing.


  2. Jessica

    Another radical genderqueer salutes you. You look nice in your photo, dear. I like your hair. Mine has always been frizzy and flat. Seems like people usually like somebody else’s hair type, seldom their own. Sometimes it is easier to tell people what you’re not than exactly what it is that you are.

    I’d love to engage in “a good discussion on radical politics” sometime. I’m a bit to the left of Noam Chomsky most days – Naomi Klein is my hero.

    I envy you being in Tucson for the Namoli Brennert concerts, but not for the hot climate (I suffer if the air temp gets above my body temp).


  3. George Grey

    Hello Ryan/Rachel/whatever you go by now – It took me ages to notice the flower in your hair. I like your list of identity markers… because they’re exactly the same as mine :D


  4. S

    You live (sorta) near me! yay!


  5. Ryan/Rachel

    pshhh you all are so NICE :3

    @Mardee I never thought of that before, but I think that’s a really good idea. I’m still mostly perceived as cis male, but perhaps when I have a better opportunity to fully transition such a name change could be more effective.

    @Jessica My hair’s a lot shorter now since I donated it. I think it gives me a bit more of an androgynous look than when it was long. I don’t remember how long ago it was that I submitted this (seeing it published caught me pretty off-guard). I think I align myself pretty spot on with Chomsky, but I haven’t been studying anarchism for very long so I’m not as well-versed in the diversity of its philosophies and angles as I’d like to be.


  6. Charles

    You seem totally awesome! :)

    May I ask, how old are you?


  7. Amy

    Vegans rock! And you are lovely! Love that flower :)


  8. Ryan/Rachel

    I’m 17 at the moment.


  9. noah

    You’re beautiful! The photo reminds me of a girl I work with, named Molly.
    I wish we could be friends in real life! You seem awesome, and I love the way you expressed yourself in the “I want people to understand…” section.


  10. bluechou

    The flower in your hair is lovely.

    I wish you weren’t ashamed to be from AZ. I’m from Texas. In both states there are a lot of nuts, but there are good people too. And there are nuts in NYC just like anywhere else. I just read Eli Clare’s book “Exile and Pride” these days I’m all about pride of place. Human love exists all over this planet. even in the darkest of places and darkest of times. Compassion is fundamental.

    I really enjoyed your profile, thank you so much for sharing a bit of yourself.


  11. Venya

    I love your hair, and the flower! You come off as very interesting, and I’d totally enjoy talking with you sometime. :p


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