What does it mean when your gender involuntarily changes?
I’ve had several phases in my life where I’ve felt or wanted to be male, but it seems to wax and wane and I have periods of time where I’m okay with (or at least tolerate) being a woman.
Some days I look in the mirror and think my boobs look pretty rocking. Some days I look and really wish I saw a flat man chest staring back at me. Even when I’m okay with being a girl, I like thinking about dressing up in suits and being called ‘he.’ I’ve always toed the line between tomboy and girly girl.
It’s been this way for as long as I can remember, from angrily casting off all girliness and trying really hard to fit in with boys one week to happily playing with barbies the next, but it’s getting stronger now. My last period of dysphoria, I was really, solidly convinced I was trans, but then that withered away and I felt alright with being a girl.
Is this genderfluid? I can’t seem to get a straight answer about what that word even means. What am I?
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