Question: Coming out as gender fluid

V asks…

What have people’s experiences been when coming out as gender fluid to friends and family? I have only this year after a lifetime of anxiety and dysphoria, come to the phenomenal realisation that this is quite obviously who I am and who I was always meant to be.

However, I am very nervous about telling people about it, because I think it will not be as obvious to them.

It’s not because my friends and family are not accepting and open-minded, they are. But they will still be confused. The thought of gender as a binary concept is still so ingrained in everyone’s minds; I almost feel like it would be easier to come out as trans* because then at least I would kind of be one single definable thing…

The thought of explaining it over and over again to everyone I talk to, with the emotional wounds from 22 years of repression and denial still ripe, feels insurmountable.

How come you haven’t said anything sooner?
How come you didn’t realise sooner?
Are you sure you’re not just exaggerating your tomboyishness?
How are we going to know when you’re a man or a woman?

Please post your response in the comments below.

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Posted by on December 1st, 2014 at 08:00 am

Category: questions 108 comments »

108 Responses to “Question: Coming out as gender fluid”

  1. Anna/Alix

    **those question marks were supposed to be a pufferfish emoji


    Riann Greysen replied:

    I was born female, and am a genderfluid person. Coming out was easy enough for me, since I was in college, but I’m almost never read correctly when I identify as male. This is due to my large breasts, which makes binding a must. However, because I’m in college, I’m also basically broke. Binders are surprisingly expensive! If anyone knows anyplace to get cheap binders; I’m all in! I came out to my professors in an email a few weeks before class started.


    Anonymous replied:

    this company has awesome quality binders for $30 at its MOST expensive product


  2. Liam Dunn

    I’m officially male and I’m gender fluid. Though most of the time I identify myself as female. If you have trouble coming out than wait for a time to be created. Don’t make a time yourself


    Anonymous replied:

    thank you.


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