Question: shaving legs

Rusty asks…

I consider myself female but agender, and I don’t like shaving my legs because it brings up a lot of negative memories about my body being gendered and objectified. I also don’t like having hairy legs because I get publicly ridiculed and hairy legs remind me of the same thing shaved legs do.

Does anyone else have this issue? I’m kind of obsessed and constantly uncomfortable.

Please post your response in the comments below.

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Posted by on May 6th, 2014 at 08:00 am

Category: questions 6 comments »

6 Responses to “Question: shaving legs”

  1. RsW

    I am in a similar battle with myself at the moment. I don’t like the act of shaving, but I also can’t stop thinking about my legs when they have hair. Now that spring is beginning, it is time to pull out the shorts, and I do not know what to do. At this point, I shave one or twice a month, so that it never gets *really* noticeable… but I’d just like to stop thinking about it entirely.

    My eyebrows are the other source of frustration in the world of body hair. I used to obsessively tweeze, but I stopped cold turkey in November. They are growing back in SO SLOWLY. It will be at least another 6 months before they don’t look awful.

    I’m trying to tell myself it’s an opportunity to practice patience. But I can’t always get myself into that headspace.


  2. Oz

    I think most of the more people have similar doubts, and I think that is why the react negatively when confronted with somebody that is strong enough to have the image that wants to have, and try to ridiculize that person. If I was to give advice, focus on yourself and thats it. The key to the problem in my case is self confidence 100% of the times. When I feel sure and I’m loving myself, doubt much less or not at all, and if I get through people that get so nervous, so self insecure and feel so weak just for the fact that I have hair, a litle or a lot, that they react laughing or trying to ridiculize me or similar, well, I just get very hostile against them, but it does not affect to how I feel to myself. The same for the case when I decide to shave. It should be only your decision, and only based on how you want your body to look like. Its hard but once you achieve feeling that sure on yourself, its addictive :)

    So I think what you need to do is be OK. And of course the people that loves you and respects you will stay, understand (or at least try), love and respect you just the same.


  3. Antonio Zapfe

    Shave one, leave the other unshaved :D


  4. Anonymous

    I have a similar problem with my face. Yeah, I was born male, but I feel totally genderqueer.

    My female self : it seems wrong to shave, but I hate having the hair there;
    My male self : I can keep it going for about a week,
    The all-inclusive self : before the conflict gets too rough.

    I finally do it about once a week, when it starts bothering me too much when I lie on it to sleep.
    As for the legs, they are lasered. :-)


  5. Gale

    I have a similar problem. I am physically female, but genderqueer (neutral pronouns and usually more masculine presentation) and shaving my legs makes me feel horrible on dysphoric days.

    Unfortunately, my mom doesn’t know and guilts me into feeling like I need to shave.
    Honestly, I have no good advice, as my solution is to wear jeans and overheat.


  6. Anonymous

    Laser hair-removal might be an option, but barring that, (if you don’t have the moolah, like me, haha), might be to wear tights? I have a bunch of different kinds of tights and hose…if you feel like bearing hairy legs, go for it, but otherwise, you can wear tights! Might not work for those who express themselves very masculinely or are looking to pass as male, but could be an option for varying dysphoria.

    To Gale: have you tried discussing this with your mom? I obviously don’t know your situation, so that might be a fruitless endeavor, but perhaps you could either just state that you feel more comfortable not shaving and leave it at that, or if you want to cover your tracks, so to speak, you could just emphatically state that it’s 2014 and you’re boning up on your feminism and gosh-darn-it women have the right to have hairy legs too, right? ;) You could always say that it’s the way the French ladies do it?…hahaha. Just suggesting things. I hear you on that though…it’s a very uncomfortable situation. I luckily stuck through it long enough to move out on my own and now do what I please, but family is tough.


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