There’s Been Enough of a Pattern…

Someone wrote…

I’m a girl, I think. AFAB for sure, but maybe not quite a girl, per se. I dunno. Anyway.

When I was a kid, like 5 or 6, I dressed up as Cinderella for Halloween. Blue fluffy dress, sparkly tiara, the works. I even had that plastic button on the dress that says what princess dress this is. Girly as all get-out.

A couple years later, I became Jessie from Toy Story. The typical movie tomboy, of course. And I was redhead, with the perfect hair for Jessie’s braid. I even had the hat.

Then, when I was twelve, I dressed as Jack Sparrow – or rather, *Captain* Jack Sparrow – from Pirates of the Carribean. A fem!Jack, but Jack nonetheless. My friend Kevin did the braids.

Last year – age fourteen – I dressed as Dr. Spencer Reid, a character from my favourite TV show, Criminal Minds. I was nowhere near as handsome, nor did I pass at all, but still. I was a cute Spencer.

This year… I don’t know. I’m fifteen, and identify as genderqueer or genderfluid. All I know is, my parents don’t believe me because “[me coming out] is too sudden for this to be real.”

Why, though? There’s been enough of a pattern…

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?

Posted by on September 2nd, 2015 at 08:00 am

Category: your voice One comment »

One Response to “There’s Been Enough of a Pattern…”

  1. Tove

    I’ve heard this a lot — that family and friends often say that someone’s coming out is “[too] sudden”, when the reality is that they just weren’t prepared for the announcement, don’t know how to feel, and are turning those feelings back on you. They’re confused, so you must be, too, right?

    It’s flawed thinking, partly rooted, usually, in the belief that young people are changeable and flighty and don’t know anything for sure. Even if you had “just decided” to identify as genderqueer/genderfluid, that doesn’t make your feelings, right now, any less true. Even if you identify as something else in a week, month, year, five years, fifty years.

    For what it’s worth, I hear you. I believe you. And I hope that your family will come down from their initial feelings of disbelief, and be able and willing to meet you where you are. <3


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