Disgusted.

Someone wrote…

Every time someone calls me “Mister,” I feel disgusted.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on March 21st, 2010 at 08:00 am

Category: your voice 7 comments »

7 Responses to “Disgusted.”

  1. K
    March 21st, 2010 at 8:34 am |

    I feel the same whenever someone calls me “Ma’am”

    [Reply]
  2. Keiran
    March 21st, 2010 at 9:50 am |

    i taught martial arts to kids and it’s pretty common that as a sign of respect, the kids respond to the instructors “yes, sir; no, sir. yes, ma’am; no, ma’am.”. on top of that you get the whole “mr. x, ms. y” deal when other instructors refer to you.
    i was always extremely uncomfortable responding to ma’am when i knew that i was really more of a sir.
    i felt–well–disgusted.

    [Reply]
  3. --Z--
    March 21st, 2010 at 9:50 am |

    I don’t feel disgusted, but it does feel inherently wrong. I used to feel like that was because I didn’t feel mature enough to warrant a title… but these days, it’s become clear that it’s really because it makes me cringe when people want to force their narrow world view on me. I don’t want that title, I never did, and nothing about it really applies to me.

    [Reply]
  4. Dae
    March 21st, 2010 at 10:23 pm |

    These days, it really bugs me when I’m called ma’am or referred to as a lady in public. I know I’m not doing much to pass, so I suppose I can’t complain, but I guess in my mind, I look much more masculine.

    [Reply]
  5. Lanthir
    March 22nd, 2010 at 9:30 am |

    Ma’am or Ms. don’t bother me *too* terribly, but I despise being refered to as a “lady.” I am not, never have been, and never will be a lady in any regard, and I’ve been getting offended over being called one for as long as I can remember, even when I still thought I was a girl.

    [Reply]
  6. Lyn Aven
    March 22nd, 2010 at 10:21 am |

    I rationalize it away when that happens, I think; it’s one of those things that sort of bugs me deep down in my gut, but I’ve gotten used to people not understanding non-binary genders so I just put up with it. It’s the same reason I don’t go out in public with pigtails AND a beard — people just don’t get it.

    [Reply]
  7. Kashi
    March 23rd, 2010 at 3:33 am |

    I taught martial arts for a while too and felt the same sort of disgust when they said yes ma’am no ma’am. The reason I no longer teach has a lot to do with the discrimination that exists against the biologically female in the organization I was with, and worse– those that are genderqueer.

    Even my current boyfriend, nice and bisexual and claims to see me as a guy, sometimes says ‘woman’ or ‘ma’am’ when joking

    When anyone refers to me with that term or jests about it, it just kind of makes me sick xP

    [Reply]

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