Category: your voice


Comfort


Someone wrote…

I was getting really hung up on struggling with what’s true for me, what’s a product of societal programming, and the incessant binary thoughts of “wait if I’m not cis then I must be trans, right?” grinding away in my head. Then I got a piece of advice that almost instantly quieted it all down and helped it all make sense for me. I go back to it frequently.

“Stop thinking of it terms of gender and start thinking of it terms of comfort. Do the “women’s” clothes you wear make you feel comfortable? Then wear them!

Does looking more femme make you feel more comfortable some days more than others? Then look femme!

Same goes for your body, the way you talk, the way you move, the way you express yourself. It doesn’t have to be about any notion of gender binary. It can just simply be about physical manifestations of what makes you feel good.”

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 22nd, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

As a child.


Someone wrote…

As a child, I was led to believe that being a girl meant that you had to like dolls, dresses, hair, and pink. I didn’t like any of these things, so I figured I was not a girl. If I was not a girl, I had to be a boy. Now I know that not fitting into a socially constructed “girly” mold does not diminish my identity as a woman.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 20th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 1 comment »

All of us


Someone wrote…

Whenever I come here and read and see you all, it makes me feel fantastic. I get courage, I get inspiration, I hear questions that I can really ask myself. I wouldn’t be me without people like you!

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 18th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Society


Someone wrote…

I’m what society would deem a transman and my partner is what society would deem a homosexual man, though neither is true as we are both more complex than this.

Yesterday my cousin asked how we defined our relationship. It’s amazing how many people feel the need to ask that question.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 16th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Very much together


Someone wrote…

Society tells us that we are all alone in our gender non-conformity, yet here we are all, very much together :)

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 14th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Twitter


Someone wrote…

I am in love with the fact that I don’t know the gender of many of folks I follow on Twitter.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 12th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Three names


Someone wrote…

I have three names: my birth name, my adoptive name and my trans name. I kinda like it that way.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 10th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Dream


Someone wrote…

I had a dream last night. I was making out with what I thought was a boy and turned out to be a girl. I was attracted to her in both ways and I woke up happy that I subconsciously had the same response as I claim to consciously.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 8th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Undefined


Someone wrote…

I know that I want to be a woman. I know that I’ve never felt like a man. But I’m really scared about going through the process of changing who I am.

I think it’s for the best to change how I identify my gender, but I don’t know how to change it or what to identify as. For the time being, I’m just calling myself “undefined” and using the umbrella-term “genderqueer”.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 6th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Always changing


Someone wrote…

Every day, I am amazed at the capacity of my always-changing body. Some days I have one gender, some days many, some days none. They are all wonderful. They all amaze me

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 4th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Baby steps


Boink wrote…

I more-or-less successfully “passed” as a girl the other day! It was also the first time I seriously wore a dress in public. Although I might have gotten a few slightly confused looks, all gendered statements I received correctly identified me as female and I didn’t get asked any gender-related questions.

I was on a vacation with a few trusted and super-supportive cis-girl friends, safely away from any acquaintances at home, but for that one day I was a girl and it felt great! I’m stuck being a boy again back at home, but that experience was so encouraging. Baby steps are still progress!

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 2nd, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 1 comment »

What I wish


Someone wrote…

I wish that I could be who I wanted to be, in the body in which I wanted to be it, without the binary expectations of society, and without the intolerance expressed by those whose gender conforms to their bodies towards those of us whose gender doesn’t.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on June 20th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Horoscopes


Someone wrote…

People are often dismissive of horoscopes because “it doesn’t make sense to divide all of humanity into only twelve categories based on the time of birth, and then expect the same things to be true of everybody within each category, it would be too much of a generalisation”.

However, I find the concept of gender very similar – you are born under certain circumstances, and it is automatically assumed you will be inclined to certain professions, hobbies or interests, that a certain set of skills will come more naturally to you, that you will prefer to act or dress in a certain way… – and yet, very few people ever question, let alone dismiss that concept. How come dividing humanity into only TWO categories isn’t perceived as too much of a generalisation?!

The biological sex someone is born as is no more indicative of the person they will become than the time (or any other random circumstance) of their birth.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on June 18th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 3 comments »

So much more


Someone wrote…

I don’t see any reason why I should have to conform to one of the gender binaries. Gender is so much more than two “opposites.”

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on June 10th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Butch side


Someone wrote…

I’m pregnant, and now I really want to celebrate my butch side!

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on June 8th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 1 comment »

Queer state of mind


Someone wrote…

Today someone asked me what I was, “gal or guy” in his words.

Quite honestly, I can’t stop laughing. I tried explaining I was somewhere in the middle, preferring male pronouns yet not being a full man. Of course, he skipped right down to the “plumbing” as they say, assuming I have a penis. I simply laughed and said I wouldn’t answer.

Perhaps he thought that specific genitalia would contribute to my queer state of mind?

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on June 6th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Mx


Someone wrote…

Today I was registering online for an academic conference and when I was entering my personal details, I was offered the option of using the title ‘Mx’ instead of ‘Mr’ or ‘Ms’.

I knew Mx was a gender-neutral title, but I’d never seen it actually used before, let alone in such an official context as a university website. I felt so relieved to be able to choose it; I never realised how much it had been getting to me having to subtly misgender myself every time I filled in an online form.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on June 4th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 3 comments »

What I am


Someone wrote…

I am a female. Born and bred.

But: I am a farm girl. Taught that my only worth in life in bearing sons. I have: shoveled manure, killed chickens, fixed cars and shot skeet.

I have fixed: cars, houses, tractors, lawnmowers, plumbing, gutters, shingles, paving, and people.

I have cooked anything and everything for any person who needs it. I have canned preserves, and planted gardens.

But, to my family, I am not entirely female. Because I am gay. Because I don’t want children of my own.

And to my friends, I am not entirely gay. Because I have dated men. Because I like to wear dresses and heels and aprons.

There is nowhere I’ve ever fit in more than with my family, more than with my LGBT family. And yet, I am not like them.

I am me. Not you. Not them. Not us.

And I love you for it.

And I love them.

And I love me.

Because I, we, them: are the ones who will change the world.

Not today. And not tomorrow.

But soon. And forever.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on May 29th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Soft volume


Someone wrote…

I’ve found that men assume I am a man and women see past the clothes and hairstyle. That being so, when I’m walking by myself and am approached by a man, and I think I can pass I find myself using my “male” voice, speaking in low toned, soft volume, clipped sentences. It makes me feel much less vulnerable and in control of the situation.

What’s stranger to me is that I do this regardless of how nice or rude the person is.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on May 27th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Freedom in my own body


Someone wrote…

Some days I want to be female. Some days I want to be masculine. I don’t think I ever want to be male. Most days I just want to be androgynous. All days I just want complete freedom in my own body.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on May 25th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 6 comments »

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