Category: your voice


What’s Real is What I Want to be Called


Someone wrote…

I go by the initials of my chosen name, and because I work with little kids, a lot of them ask my “real” name. They clarify with “the name your parents gave you when you were born.” It was hard to figure out at first – how much of the truth should I give?

I’m a horrible liar – but I’ve learned to say that my chosen name is my “full name” and my initials are my “real name.” This makes sense to them, and is true! What’s real is what I want to be called, and my birth name doesn’t even have to be part of it.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 27th, 2015 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

What is Gender Even??


Someone wrote…

What is gender even?? Pink and blue?? Makeup??? Smelling like sweat and tears if you’re feeling manly and a flower meadow when you’re feeling feminine?????

What mental differences do men and women have, and where do genderqueer folk fall?? What is the difference between penne pasta and ziti??? Is it really so random or like are there actual answers???

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 25th, 2015 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Exploring


Someone wrote…

I think exploring my gender identity is exciting, but sometimes it seems pointless since I don’t know anyone I could ever express it to.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 23rd, 2015 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Preferred Names


Someone wrote…

The struggle is so real. I recently figured out my preferred name (all I knew was that I couldn’t stand my birth name). However, I have ADHD, which sometimes makes me a bit absent-minded, to the point where I’ll refer to myself by my birth name, even in my head. Totally on accident, of course, but still:

…I literally forget my own name. *Single tear*

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 21st, 2015 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Changes in Latitude


Someone wrote…

I’m woking on my podcast ChangesInLatitudesPodcast.blogspot.com and in doing it for almost a year now I’ve come to realize that I’m not a TransWoman, but more of a genderqueer/genderfluid person. Since this is a “large grey area” of description I’ll narrow it down by describing myself as a “feminine male”.

I feel more in tune and in touch with myself and more grounded.
Today I feel a bit more feminine as I’m waking up, but that may change as I start to move and get out of bed.

Thanks for being here.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 19th, 2015 at 08:00 am

podcasts, your voice | Comment »

Just Between you and me


Someone wrote…

My best friend started using my preferred name today! *squeals in delight* My family has no clue about any of it, though, so it’ll be our little secret, Internet. Just between you and me.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 17th, 2015 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Pronoun Jars


Someone wrote…

At my school there are a crapload of LGBT+ kids, new ones coming out every now and again. In one class, Art History II, it’s pretty much all nonbinary kids, so there are all these different pronouns, and we trip over them enough to the point where it’s getting irritating for everyone.

So we made a Pronouns Jar. It’s this big cleaned-out jumbo peanut-butter jar, with a Hi-My-Name-Is sticker on the front. Every time you get someone’s pronouns wrong, you put a bit of whatever pocket change you have into the jar. We use the money to buy a piece of whatever “equipment” someone needs to pass (binder, etc) if they’re not in a situation to buy it themselves.

The Pronouns Jar fund even helped me: I’m bigender (queer/girl) but I have a masculine body, so the PJ money went to buying me a beautiful dress that doesn’t require a feminine body in order to look amazing.

I love all of you! May the glory of the God of Pronoun Jars rain down upon you all! :D

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 15th, 2015 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Coming Out


Someone wrote…

My name is Christine (mtf, born Henry). I was born one of four boys, raised by our dad, since mom passed away when I was five. (All my brothers are older than me, and they’re all in university this year.) I’ve known I was transgender my whole life, but I couldn’t find the proper word until about a year ago. I came out my brother Arnold, and later, when Dad expressed some open-mindedness about gender, I came out to the whole family. Everyone seemed queasy and awkward, and I knew I’d done something wrong, so my anxiety sent me flying to my room. I went to school the next day, dreading the uneasiness of coming home to an awkward household and a silent dinner.

Instead, when I came home, I went to my room, but Arnold blocked my path. Dad and my remaining brothers joined us, and Dad said, “We have a surprise for you.”

He opened the door, revealing that they’d redecorated my room while I was at school. Everything was feminine, pink (my favourite colour), and just beautiful. There was even a sign above my bed that read “Christine” in cursive. I was crying from a combination of shock, joy, and overwhelming love; and I would’ve collapsed to my knees if Dad hadn’t caught me.

He pulled me up, and he said, “I love you, Henr–I mean, Christine. Always have, always will. All of us.” He leaned in with a sneaky smile and continued, “And between you and me, I always wanted a daughter!” We both laughed.

Have I mentioned how much I love my family?

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 13th, 2015 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Decide on Their own


Riley wrote…

The other day, I was talking to my mom (who strictly believes in the binary and all that) and up came the subject of giving birth to an intersex child. Both of us had heard stories of parents who had tried reparative surgery, only to discover that they’d removed the wrong organ. Neither of us wanted that for any children I might have.

“I say let the kid grow up and decide on their own,” my mom said. “You don’t want to make the decision for them and then have them suffer for it until they can transition or whatever.”

Wow, Mom. Where was that attitude when I came out two years ago…?

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 11th, 2015 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

People can be Free


Someone wrote…

I am a 56-year-old genderfluid person. I was named female by heterosexual and heterogendered doctors. they had no idea how I would ever feel about this. it has marked my whole life. I didn’t ask for that to be imposed onto this little body.

I have spent nearly all my life feeling like their decision was my fault. this is my body and I like it. I just don’t call it female because it doesn’t look like what females look like. And I don’t feel feminine. or masculine.

I just feel great in a suit and a smart shirt and a tie. I love ties. I just want to dress like this and not get called odd. or laughed at. I am so tired of being laughed at.

I am so happy things are finally changing and people can be free. to wear a suit and a shirt and a tie. it really can’t be like it was for people in the future.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 9th, 2015 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Pro/Con


Someone wrote…

Genderfluidity–

Pro: Often no surgery or medical transition
Con: Often no surgery or medical transition

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 7th, 2015 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

To Express Myself Freely


Someone wrote…

Okay… Hello. ^^; I am Emily, a genderfluid pansexual (Female at birth) and I recently came out to a few people.. I’m happy because most* of them accepted me for who I am (I AM the same person as before, after all) and tried to learn more about me.

I haven’t told the whole world about myself yet but I hope to, soon enough. I want to just be able to express myself freely without anyone giving me weird looks… I want a short haircut, I wanna wear “boy’s” clothes, I wanna walk how I want, talk how I want… I can’t explain it in words. I hope I can do this soon. I’ll be a lot happier then. :3

*One of my friends couldn’t accept this fact and tried to convince me that I am most definitely a girl…

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 5th, 2015 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Tiara


Someone wrote…

There’s this picture of the 8 year old me dressed as a boy (grey sneakers, black baggy sweatpants and an oversized grey and black hoodie)… wearing a princess tiara.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 3rd, 2015 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Cheekbones


Someone wrote…

When I was a kid, I wanted cheekbones so I could look like a girl. Now, I want cheekbones so I can look like a guy.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 1st, 2015 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Some days


Someone wrote…

I’m pretty much okay with how my body is physically (to put it bluntly I like having a vagina and a bit of boob) but I feel like mentally I’m detached from my body and my mental gender can fluctuate.

I look at myself and I can see myself as feminine or masculine or androgynous and I like it that way. I wouldn’t mind being referred to by any pronoun. Some days I feel more masculine or feminine or somewhere in the middle and present accordingly.

Given all this I think I am genderfluid but I have heard a lot of people say you can’t be trans without dysphoria and I don’t have dysphoria. I do experience gender euphoria though which I just learned is a thing. I don’t like being called a girl or a woman but it’s just a mild discomfort.

I am just looking for some validation really. I’m confused and don’t know if it’s okay for me to feel this way. Am I just a cis girl with internalized misogyny? I don’t like feeling limited.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 30th, 2015 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Hey, Call Me Riley!


Riley Alexandr wrote…

To the tune of “Tell Her About It” by Billy Joel

Listen up
‘Cause there’s one quick thing
It’s been weighing on my mind
I was gonna wait
But it’d be too late
Though I’ve got time on my side

I’m a loving friend
And a real great listener, too
But today is when
The listener is you

Oh, listen up
I’m sure that you think
You know exactly what to say
You don’t want some kid correcting you
But there’s a will so there’s a way

You might think you know me
‘Cause you see me every day
But that’s one more reason why I’ve gotta say…

CHORUS:
Hey, call me Riley
I’m a guy and I’m a girl
There’s a spectrum labelled gender
Wouldn’t trade it for the world

Hey, call me Riley
‘Cause I’m genderfluid, see
If you could, just call me Riley
That would mean so much to me

Listen up
‘Cause dysphoria sucks
And I’m not asking a lot
Just one simple thing
That would help me out
Considering what all I got

When I try to pass
I’m hella insecure
But to start off there’s one thing that helps for sure…

CHORUS:
Hey, call me Riley
It’s a way to show you care
When you see me walking
Say, “Hey, Riley!” and I’m there

Hey call me Riley
It’s a name that you should use
When in need of my attention
That’s the name that you should choose

Cause now and then
I’ll get to worrying
And I’ll start to feel this hopelessness inside
Though you may not have done anything
Is that helping me or telling me to hide?

Listen up
‘Cause it’s hard to be myself with no respect
If we’re friends at all
Then it’s not too tall
Of an order to expect

That you call me by
The name that I told you
So the next time we meet up
Here’s what you do:

(chorus x2)

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 28th, 2015 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Who I am


Someone wrote…

I want to be accepted for who I am, not who I am supposed to be.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 26th, 2015 at 09:56 pm

your voice | Comment »

You’re Dressing as You


Someone wrote…

Clothing does NOT – I repeat NOT – make the gender.

My boyfriend reminded me of this a few weeks back, when I didn’t want to wear a bracelet he got me. I wanted to wear it, honestly, but it was too girly for my identity. (I’m trans, ftm by the way. He didn’t know when he got me the bracelet.) I told him this as gently as I could.

He countered with, “If I prove that this bracelet won’t make you less of a man, would you wear it?” I told him yes.

He then proceeded to wear the bracelet around school (with a short sleeved shirt), and when anyone questioned it, he said, “I’m sorry you think men can’t wear bracelets. You must lead a boring life. I’m a man wearing a bracelet, and I feel no insecurity whatsoever. Still a man.” Gradually, he talked to almost every guy in the school.

The next week, guys started wearing bracelets to school. It was just a few at first, but then it turned into more and more, till almost everyone wore a bracelet. My boyfriend even took pictures and showed them to me. In one picture, one guy held a sign reading “#StillAMan”.

I wear the bracelet every day now, and it reminds me how much I love him, and it also reminds me that clothing does not make the gender. I can wear this bracelet wherever and whenever I want, and I am #StillAMan.

Clothing does NOT – I repeat NOT – make the gender. You can wear a bracelet or makeup or a dress and still be a man. For my trans sisters out there, you can wear pants and a hoodie and sneakers and still be a woman. Heck, wear whatever y’all wanna wear. You’re not dressing “as a woman” or “as a man”. You’re dressing as YOU.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 24th, 2015 at 08:00 am

your voice | 1 comment »

Six Years


Someone wrote…

I came out to my mother as non-binary after six years of knowing. Halfway through telling her, she said “it’s totally fine, but this is confusing” and left. I admit I’m a little hurt that she didn’t even try to understand the concept of more than two genders when it applies to her child.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 22nd, 2015 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

I Feel More Complete


Someone wrote…

Up until now I though I was just female, but with people starting to be so open on the internet and on TV about LGBTQI+ issues I started to discover that there are more than just two genders. I guess I was sort of aware but now that I began to really think about it, I feel like I’m gender-queer!

It’s so weird and confusing but, also, really amazing because now everything makes so much sense. I am female bodied and it has always felt right, but I was never the girly-girl, or the ultimate tomboy – I liked certain “girl” things and certain “boy” things. I always felt sort of in-between and nowhere all at once. But now I have found a name for it and people I can relate to but, most of all, I feel more complete.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 12th, 2015 at 08:00 am

your voice | 1 comment »

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