Category: your voice


Life isn’t static


Someone wrote…

You are never too young to state what orientation you identify with. If it changes, thats okay too; it can change just as much for an older person because life isn’t a static thing and humans are no exception.

Reposted from Emiskullduggery

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on October 23rd, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 1 comment »

Legs


Someone wrote…

I’m a gender fluid person and I don’t shave my legs.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on October 21st, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Bittersweet


Someone wrote…

Gender exploration can be so bittersweet. I’ve got the most unquestionably feminine outfit on that I’ve tried yet. I look completely badass in it and I love it. But then I wish I felt free enough to dress like this every day and it’s devastating that I don’t.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on October 19th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 1 comment »

Lies, Damned Lies, and Statistics


Someone wrote…

You don’t really have to understand math to know why this sucks:

My statistics homework recently asked this multiple choice question:

“Does the given procedure result in a binomial distribution?: Recording the genders of 150 people in a statistics class”

Answers:
A. Yes
C. No, because there are more than two possible outcomes.
(B and D don’t matter)

The question is, do I go against the whole of who I am and answer A “correctly,” or do I answer C, forfeiting a good grade, and knowing that the teacher won’t pick up on the point?

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on October 17th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 4 comments »

Situations


Ansa wrote…

I have no idea. I’m sometimes a girl, sometimes a guy. Definitely one of those. Not even day to day change, just situations I want to be recognized as a specific gender. I want my boobs to go away most of the time, then rare moments where I’m okay with these lumps of fat. I want to quit being instantly recognized as female.

I identify as genderfluid but have no idea what to do with my pronouns because I want male or female but not sure what times and it’s frustrating and I don’t quite know what to do with it. Gender is awesome as a spectrum, but figuring it out sucks sometimes.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on October 15th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

The other day


Someone wrote…

I was buying a phone the other day, with two sales people (one training) helping to set it up. The woman kept saying “he” when referring to me, while the boy said “she.” It was apparent that the woman had realized that I “wasn’t” male, but had kept calling me “he” because she didn’t want to admits she was wrong. It was also apparent that the boy thought he was doing me a favor by trying to subtly pass hints to his manager that I was “female.”

I just find it funny that people try so hard to think about gender, yet they’re spending so much time trying to figure out whether I’m male or female that they don’t try to find out whether I’m a girl or a boy, never mind whether I’m something else.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on October 13th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 1 comment »

The voice


Someone wrote…

I realized that I can change my gender presentation simply by varying my voice. That is powerful.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on October 11th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 1 comment »

To truly be myself


Someone wrote…

I do not seek or expect perfection in other people, because I do not want other people to seek or expect perfection in me. I’m also a mess when it comes to even the idea of relationships.

I recently met someone that I really like. I mean REALLY LIKE. So, wanting so very much to truly be myself with someone and let them make up their mind about me (judge me) without any BS from me, I told this person everything. I told this person that I identify as androgyne or ‘both genders at the same time, at least on the inside’. I was scared, but I did it.

This person looked me in the eye, shrugged a little, and said, “Okay.” Since then, this person has told me a few times that they like me. That they REALLY LIKE me.

Sometimes I find myself thinking that this person just might be ‘perfect’ for me and I might be ‘perfect’ for them. Talking about mushy, relationshipy stuff is one hurdle that both of us have yet to fully climb over, if that ever happens, but I feel very accepted for who I really am. All that I am.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on October 9th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Pushing the boundaries


Someone wrote…

I have been reading your website for about a year now and I am so happy to know that there are a lot of other people in this world who don’t accept the gender that society imposes on them and are willing to push the boundaries.

“Beauty in ambiguity” is exactly right and I admire all of you for your courage to be who you are and not what others think you should be.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on October 7th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Genderfluidity


Minefloozle wrote…

I’m genderfluid, and I realized it less than a year ago– before then, I don’t remember ever thinking that my gender was anything other than “female.” So when I go for days without my gender changing, I start to question how well “genderfluid” fits me, and I get scared… I love being genderfluid.

I wish I hadn’t internalized so much doubt about it being a valid identity.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on October 5th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

The unrealistic state of beauty standards


Someone wrote…

My first year of gender non-conformism has already given me so much respect and empathy for the social beauty pressure women have to deal with.

I’ve always been so against unrealistic beauty ideals for women, yet here I am now comparing my 40-year-old male-bodied self to thin gorgeous millennials on Pinterest or whatever, and feeling bad about not matching up.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on October 3rd, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

I know who I am


Someone wrote…

I’m feeling more queer than ever, yet my appearance is more femme than ever. I’m comfortably wearing skirts for the first time in my life. I no longer worry about the way others perceive me because of them. I know who I am.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on October 1st, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Ah-ha moments


Someone wrote…

I’ve had a few “ah-ha” moments in this past year of gender identity exploration that have really helped me get past a bunch of fear and insecurities. For instance…

One of the first things I did was to get a pair of tall women’s riding boots (I’m a bio-male human person). When I wore them out in public I got such a wide range of comments and questions about them, and NONE of them had anything to do with them being women’s boots. Some people made horse jokes. Someone thought I was being “fancy”. Some guy at a nightclub said, “Sick boots, bro! Are those military?”

It clicked immediately for me that you just can’t control how other people contextualize what you are expressing. Everybody sees things through their own lens and, really, the only thing that matters is how I see myself through my lens. I don’t even care if somebody kinda makes me fun of me anymore. That’s their problem.

I would love to hear nuggets or experiences that other people have found especially valuable!

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on September 25th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Labels and Boundaries


Someone wrote…

I feel as if my body is not mine because it does not match the me on the inside. Feminine and masculine all at once. In between in a world of labels, I will continue to stretch my boundaries being myself.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on September 22nd, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

The manifestations of the human body


Someone wrote…

I often find myself wondering why gender and sexuality are such an issue.

If someone is born female but feels male (and the other way around)… shouldn’t we, as a people, help this individual to become “healthy” or “whole?”

And if some one wants to be in between some place, what is it any of anyone else’s business? Why can’t people, at a minimum, mind their own damn business?

If you don’t like what other people choose to do with their bodies and lives, it seems to me to be your problem, not theirs, in any shape or form. Don’t look if it makes you uncomfortable because there are plenty of people that enjoy all of the manifestations of the human body and will do that which is within their power to assist others to feel comfortable in their bodies, emotions, and life. If someones gender or sexual orientation prevents you from wanting to know them then you are completely undeserving of said individuals attention.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on September 18th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

The first time out loud


Someone wrote…

I’m trying to figure out my relationship to gender. I’m biologically female and reasonably comfortable with that. I don’t necessarily think of myself as female, though.

Sometimes I think of myself as male, sometimes female, sometimes without any gender attached. So genderqueer comes the closest to expressing my gender. I’ve had my personality described as a masculine woman and I’m attracted to people who are on the androgynous side of their expressed gender.

This is the first time I’ve said this anywhere.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on September 16th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

The appreciation of all of me


Someone wrote…

I’m AFAB, but I’ve never felt particularly attached to the notion of myself as a girl/woman, or to the notion of any one particular gender – as applied to myself – at all.

Some days I feel slightly more feminine or masculine, but most of the time I fall somewhere else on the gender spectrum, or completely outside it. However, I find myself attracted mostly to gay men, or bisexual men who tend to lean more towards homosexuality. While I feel completely comfortable with my body and my physical appearance, it is rather discouraging to think that it – being obviously biologically female – lowers the odds of someone I’m attracted to being attracted back to me practically to zero (living in a conservative country where a significant part of the population does not realise or accept that it is possible to be anything other than cishet doesn’t help either).

I just wish that for once, someone could appreciate me in all of my maleness, femaleness and queerness.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on September 12th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Throw caution to the wind


Someone wrote…

I wish I could sign my name here.

But I don’t identify with my ultra binary name and I haven’t gotten the courage to change it. If it were up to me I’d just throw caution to the wind and start introducing myself as something more neutral, more comfortable, more me.

I know that I’d end up going by two different names, because my family would never call me something else. The dilemma will probably never cease.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on September 10th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

To Cherish


Someone wrote…

My gender used to be very private. A warm secret I liked to keep to myself and pull out in the quiet, dark of my person. It was something I cherished, holding it near me and wanting no one else to see.

Now, I feel as if I want to tell the world. So I can be perceived in the way I want to be, while still keeping my true gender all to myself.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on September 8th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Melting


Someone wrote…

I’m a male-bodied human who has been wearing about 75% women’s clothes for about 9 months. For the most part, my tastes are pretty ambiguously gendered. (If I could have it my way-and I know, I can-I would be a tomboy-ish female.) So nobody really even recognizes what I’m doing so far. There’s one girl at work who always comments on the way I dress, and the other day she said, “Oh my gosh, WHERE do you shop?? You know, I just want to be you…but like, a girl version.” I just froze for a few seconds, thinking, “Yeah, you and me both.”

And then pretty much felt like just melting all over the floor.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on September 6th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 5 comments »

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