Category: your voice


The manifestations of the human body


Someone wrote…

I often find myself wondering why gender and sexuality are such an issue.

If someone is born female but feels male (and the other way around)… shouldn’t we, as a people, help this individual to become “healthy” or “whole?”

And if some one wants to be in between some place, what is it any of anyone else’s business? Why can’t people, at a minimum, mind their own damn business?

If you don’t like what other people choose to do with their bodies and lives, it seems to me to be your problem, not theirs, in any shape or form. Don’t look if it makes you uncomfortable because there are plenty of people that enjoy all of the manifestations of the human body and will do that which is within their power to assist others to feel comfortable in their bodies, emotions, and life. If someones gender or sexual orientation prevents you from wanting to know them then you are completely undeserving of said individuals attention.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on September 18th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

The first time out loud


Someone wrote…

I’m trying to figure out my relationship to gender. I’m biologically female and reasonably comfortable with that. I don’t necessarily think of myself as female, though.

Sometimes I think of myself as male, sometimes female, sometimes without any gender attached. So genderqueer comes the closest to expressing my gender. I’ve had my personality described as a masculine woman and I’m attracted to people who are on the androgynous side of their expressed gender.

This is the first time I’ve said this anywhere.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on September 16th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

The appreciation of all of me


Someone wrote…

I’m AFAB, but I’ve never felt particularly attached to the notion of myself as a girl/woman, or to the notion of any one particular gender – as applied to myself – at all.

Some days I feel slightly more feminine or masculine, but most of the time I fall somewhere else on the gender spectrum, or completely outside it. However, I find myself attracted mostly to gay men, or bisexual men who tend to lean more towards homosexuality. While I feel completely comfortable with my body and my physical appearance, it is rather discouraging to think that it – being obviously biologically female – lowers the odds of someone I’m attracted to being attracted back to me practically to zero (living in a conservative country where a significant part of the population does not realise or accept that it is possible to be anything other than cishet doesn’t help either).

I just wish that for once, someone could appreciate me in all of my maleness, femaleness and queerness.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on September 12th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Throw caution to the wind


Someone wrote…

I wish I could sign my name here.

But I don’t identify with my ultra binary name and I haven’t gotten the courage to change it. If it were up to me I’d just throw caution to the wind and start introducing myself as something more neutral, more comfortable, more me.

I know that I’d end up going by two different names, because my family would never call me something else. The dilemma will probably never cease.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on September 10th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

To Cherish


Someone wrote…

My gender used to be very private. A warm secret I liked to keep to myself and pull out in the quiet, dark of my person. It was something I cherished, holding it near me and wanting no one else to see.

Now, I feel as if I want to tell the world. So I can be perceived in the way I want to be, while still keeping my true gender all to myself.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on September 8th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Melting


Someone wrote…

I’m a male-bodied human who has been wearing about 75% women’s clothes for about 9 months. For the most part, my tastes are pretty ambiguously gendered. (If I could have it my way-and I know, I can-I would be a tomboy-ish female.) So nobody really even recognizes what I’m doing so far. There’s one girl at work who always comments on the way I dress, and the other day she said, “Oh my gosh, WHERE do you shop?? You know, I just want to be you…but like, a girl version.” I just froze for a few seconds, thinking, “Yeah, you and me both.”

And then pretty much felt like just melting all over the floor.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on September 6th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 5 comments »

My philosophy


Someone wrote…

I’m on this journey of exploration in gender and sexuality. Sometimes, I don’t feel like I fit in anywhere. My gender expression is my own, and I hate that I feel this need to fit into a label. I am masculine, and I am feminine. I enjoy sometimes being seen as a man and other times as a woman. That middle ambiguous area really makes me feel comfortable with myself – strong, confident, and more like who I really am. I guess I am gender queer.

But, where does sexuality fit into that? Can someone who is gender queer be gay, or straight? How can you say with any certainty who you are interested in? I envy those people who are so sure of their sexuality that they completely know who they are attracted to. It leaves me feeling inadequate and confused.

My philosophy is to live my life being who I am – never lying to anyone about myself ever again. When I find someone who lights my fire, I am confident that the physical will fall into place. Whoever I fall in love with will win my heart, regardless of gender. I only hope that someone will love me for me like that – for me and not my sexual organs.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on September 4th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 4 comments »

Assumptions


Someone wrote…

I wrote an article recently and was asked to include a short bio about myself. I chose my words carefully and supplied a bio without using pronouns. For some reason, the editor changed it anyway and the published result identified me using gendered pronouns.

I decided not to raise it with the editor, but I’ve been thinking about it ever since. How do I really want people to see me? I don’t like the assumptions that come with being assigned/presumed female, but if it wasn’t for the assumptions … maybe I wouldn’t mind being identified as female? I guess it’s impossible to know, since gender roles are so deeply ingrained in our culture and how people treat each other. And on top of that, I guess I still feel apprehensive about being very public about identifying as genderqueer, hence my circuitous route of trying to avoid pronouns rather than just choosing ‘they’ or similar.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on September 2nd, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Missing


Someone wrote…

I’m sick of falling asleep to feel whole, only to wake up and find parts missing.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 31st, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Rockin’


Someone wrote…

I saw a little boy at a concert on Sunday – probably 5 years old – wearing this rockin’ teal and white chevron ankle-length skirt. Made me remember that I want to dedicate my life to making sure that that’s okay no matter where you live.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 29th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Restroom


Someone wrote…

I like being able to use the female restroom and not get clocked for being a male in a past life. I never take it for granted because I know others do not have it as easy as I do.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 27th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 1 comment »

The slightest alteration


Someone wrote…

It’s interesting how even the slightest alteration to one’s appearance can mean the difference between being read as male or female.

I recently purchased a small messenger bag to carry my phone, wallet, etc., and I am finding that I’m now being read as female. I suspect it’s because the strap goes right down the middle of my chest, accentuating my biological figure. It’s also not much bigger than a purse, but was advertised as a men’s bag. I usually pass as male about 90% of the time, but adding this bag to my ensemble has tilted the scales in the other direction. I feel compelled to get rid of it and continue putting things into my pockets.

I’m sad. I loved that bag. Any suggestions for bags that don’t divide one’s chest would be greatly appreciated. Sometimes backpacks are too bulky.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 19th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 7 comments »

Sight Seeing


Someone wrote…

For the first day ever, I sent a day out sight seeing and was never gendered female. It was a wonderful feeling.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 17th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Mirror


Someone wrote…

It’s not that I don’t like who I see in the mirror. It’s just not me.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 15th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 1 comment »

Glitter and bow-ties


Someone wrote…

Some days I am all glitter and sparkles, and others I am all flannel and bow-ties.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 13th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 3 comments »

Bathrooms


Someone wrote…

I’ve always been comfortable using women’s bathrooms when there aren’t any gender neural ones around. It’s a few other people who get uncomfortable.

They look at my hair and clothes, superficial details about me as a person, and assume I’m a man using the wrong bathroom. Some even get aggressive and yell at me as if I’m a predator. I feel that they should notice my comfortable demeanor and realize that I’m not in the wrong bathroom.

It gets old having to explain to strangers that sometimes women look masculine, every time I have to use the bathroom but, on the bright side, their exposure to me is a lesson on gender. Eventually I won’t have to deal with women who think they know my anatomy more than I do.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 11th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Matches


Someone wrote…

When I have clothes and a style that matches where I am at with my gender I feel more available, open, and loving.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 9th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Expressions


Someone wrote…

I’m so nervous about expressing myself to my family and community. Most of my family understand binarily trans people just fine, and so do a fair number of people where I live, but a lot of people are prejudiced against them – how are they going to react to someone who’s some third gender?

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 7th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Pass


Someone wrote…

I feel like I pass the most on days when my gender hasn’t crossed my mind and therefore I am not trying to pass.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 5th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Groovy tights


Someone wrote…

As a trans person, I spend all my time trying to present as a guy. But lately, I long more and more to dress in skirts, with combat boots and groovy tights.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 3rd, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Back to top