You can call me… Rowan

I identify as… I don’t really like using any of the technical terms used to describe people. Of course many people are comfortable identifying themselves in a few words, but I find it too hard to do for myself or other people. Since this site is mostly based on gender identity, I will say that I don’t really feel like a boy or a girl.

As far as third-person pronouns go, … Though I haven’t thought about the possibility of people using different pronouns for long at all, I don’t think I really mind. If people assume I’m something other than what I was born as then I actually feel complimented by it, since I’m trying to escape the implications made by such things. I’m not really a fan of the hybrid ones though.

I’m attracted to… essentially, anyone. I have no gender preference or interest in sexual relationships, so my attractions are mostly only based on mentality, but it’s important to add that I am completely open to polyamory.

When people talk about me, I want them to… forget about things being “weird” or even just different for a moment.

I want people to understand… other people, including myself. If this isn’t possible, I want them to at least try, and to be kind, which people so often aren’t in the face of something they don’t understand.

About Rowan
Sometimes I want to tell everyone in the world that I have love and affection for them. I want to make beautiful stories for everyone to enjoy. I want to live a life that’s simple and childlike but fun and exciting.

» Define yourself. «

DSC_0929, originally uploaded by behindthelens21.

Connor recommends…

I met Peterson in 2008 in Portland, OR when they did a show at the local queer youth center. I was blown away after what I saw in “Transfigurations,” a one “man” show about trans/differently gendered folks in the Bible. My first reaction was to question his sources (in a curious way)since these stories challenged so much of what I grew up being taught; but what I found that not only is Peterson highly educated in these topics, they allow us to understand and see these stories in an entirely different light.

» Recommend something. «

Even after landing The Rachel Maddow Show with MSNBC and compromising with the producers over make-up and a more mainstream appearance, Rachel can still be seen without make-up, rocking nerdy glasses, and wishing us all a happy new year.

rev08023, originally uploaded by jemappellejane.

Someone wrote…

Someone suggested we play a board game, boys vs. girls. I did a quick head count, three boys, three girls, and me. I should have played for both teams.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?

A reader asks…

How do you curvier biological females bind yourselves so that your breasts, hips, butt and thighs don’t look overly feminine? I have a large bust, small waist and wide hips and I want to hide that fact.

Please post your response in the comments below.

» Ask Genderfork «

Halloween Pouts, originally uploaded by Jade M. Sheldon.

You can call me… William. Or Liam.

I identify as… Firstly, me.
A polyamorous straight/asexual genderqueer transguy.
As a person in my own right, no matter how much or how little you understand or want to understand how I am.

As far as third-person pronouns go, … He, his, him. PLEASE. They, their, them if you must but not she and definitely not IT.

I’m attracted to… people. My partner. My closest friends. Femininity. Genderqueerness. Open minds and open hearts. People who can see me as a person and understand I AM trans and this isn’t going to change.

When people talk about me, I want them to… say how funny I am or how clever I am. Or how much they love me, what a good friend I am. Talk about my work and my life and almost forget that I’m trans because it isn’t always that important.

Be frank when other people get my pronoun wrong and say “He’s a boy” rather than ignoring it or saying “He’s transsexual” and expecting them to take all that in and understand it.

Recognise that being transsexual isn’t my single defining feature. That I am more than my body and what i may or may not do with it.

I want people to understand… that they don’t need to understand. That I will still be a boy whether they can understand the how and the why of it or not.
That this is important to me and not a joke or an act of attention-seeking.
That everyone has to live their own lives and happiness is not a commodity anyone should have to do without.

That “straight” does not mean I ONLY like women (it’s just a preference. My partner is genderless and I love hir very much) and “polyamorous” does not mean promiscious (ask my girlfriend).

And that boys, even trans boys, can wear necklaces and collect dolls if they want to!

About Liam
Liam is a young writer and filmmaker studying philosophy at the University of York. He’s been out as trans for almost a year now and living as a man since January 2009.

» Define yourself. «

Jack recommends…

The picture at the top could be seen as pretty othering, but otherwise this is a great story. It’s about Sam. At four years old Sam decides to wear a pink sundress to school. It’s a story all about how to support your child and how preparing them for the fact that they might be bullied for dressing outside of gender binaries is much better for the child than stopping them being who they are to try and protect them. This always cheers me up when I’m having a bad day.

» Recommend something. «

Mug shot of Eugenie Falleni, Central Police Station Sydney, 1920, originally uploaded by juffrouwjo.

Someone wrote…

I don’t hate my body, it’s just not my thing. It’s like that dress you see in the window that’s gorgeous, but not your color.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?

P1320442Jam, originally uploaded by Syd London.

You can call me… Lucas, Lucas Shane. Angél, Ennis, LS. JPeg. Puck the fairy Robin Goodfellow. The weird one. The manman. Or, “Hey….uh…you!” if you can’t think of anything else.

I identify as… Female-to-male transgender. A pansexual throwback who doesn’t pay enough attention. An anti-social recluse who is usually the life of the party. A short-story writer (huge fan of Annie Proulx). A drama student, a theatre technician. A photographer who always has something to look at. A person with ever-changing interests which the world sometimes cannot keep up with.

As far as third-person pronouns go, … He, him, his. Although most people still call me she. I will respond to any pronoun, though. The children at the drama camp I am a counselor for understand. They call me “he” when everyone else doesn’t.

I’m attracted to… My boy Jayke, who is also FTM. We beat the statistical odds together, man! Anyone, if they have a good personality, two eyes, a nose and a mouth, I’m good.

When people talk about me, I want them to… say what they want to. Say what they think of me. I want them to know that what they think is just as important as what other people think.

I want people to understand… That I am me and though I may evolve and morph, I will not fully change. I want them to understand that I would rather go by my chosen name and pronouns. I want them to understand that I am me.

» Define yourself. «

Picky’s Frickin’ Udderly Fab-U-Losh Roadtrip, originally uploaded by beenbair.

Someone wrote…

I want my queer radical friends to understand that I’m carving out a space for myself in femme and that it’s just as much work and questioning as the identity I claimed before, that femme is a queer performance of gender.

Please trust my agency. I haven’t capitulated–I’m still myself, and I love it.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?

You can call me… crazy but that’s all right.

I identify as… a human, female in the biological sense, but a little different when it comes to gender identity – comfortable with my body but wishing it were a little more boy-shaped/androgynous sometimes. Basically, queer. Labels are kind of annoying, but are good for rallying points.

As far as third-person pronouns go, … female, although it’s fun when people mistake me for a boy because I like being androgynous.

I’m attracted to… Skin is skin.

When people talk about me, I want them to… not jump to their own conclusions.

I want people to understand… making more labels isn’t exactly going to solve anything.

About –
A girl everyone thinks is too young to “decide” being queer by herself. Small Korean with glasses and a short pixie cut. Amazingly tolerant parents who could care less who she loves as long as they don’t do pot or shoot people. Bookish nerd. Likes cats and playing with hair but not cats playing with hair.

» Define yourself. «

green, originally uploaded by peterrrabbit.

You can call me… Queue

I identify as… Masculine/genderfree by nature, female-identified by choice. (It doesn’t really fit, but neither does anything else.)

As far as third-person pronouns go, … I use female ones to refer to myself; I don’t have any problem with others using masculine ones for me.

I’m attracted to… Women. Or other genderqueer folk.

When people talk about me, I want them to… not make assumptions about my life based on how I look.

I want people to understand… that I don’t mind being ambiguous about my gender, and that I’m not offended by being called any gender, as long as it wasn’t mean offensively.

That I do have the right to ID as female for political purposes even if I know that’s not wholly accurate.

About Queue
I’m a sixteen-year-old female-bodied genderqueer lesbian. I have no real concept of what gender would mean to me personally, in terms of feeling male or female. My interests and manner of dress are extraordinarily “non-feminine”. I know I *don’t* feel female (or male, at that). The words “lady” and “girl” being used in reference to me make me a little uncomfortable, only because I feel they aren’t accurate.

But I’m not dysphoric, and I prefer feminine pronouns if asked. I don’t feel any more male than I do female, and I don’t buy the idea of “male as neutral”. To use male pronouns feel like it’d be saying I’m male, and I’m not. But I don’t mind when people use masculine pronouns for me, because I do appear quite male.

» Define yourself. «

Heart-warming wedding footage from Youtube user genderlessTrent.