All Posts by this Contributor


Question: Halting Biology


Monster asks…

I’m a FAAB gendermixed/transqueer and I just can’t deal with getting periods anymore. I can’t keep this up, the regression back into a depressed pit of gender dysphoria every month, then re-learning how to build myself back up.

Going on T isn’t an option.

Going on pills or shots that will trick my body into thinking I’m pregnant isn’t an option. (because enhanced feminine features is the last thing that will make the dysphoria go away)

Are there other alternatives?

Thanks so much. So greatly appreciated! :D

Please post your response in the comments below.

» Ask Genderfork «


Posted by on September 1st, 2014 at 08:00 am

questions | 3 comments »

Missing


Someone wrote…

I’m sick of falling asleep to feel whole, only to wake up and find parts missing.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 31st, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Rockin’


Someone wrote…

I saw a little boy at a concert on Sunday – probably 5 years old – wearing this rockin’ teal and white chevron ankle-length skirt. Made me remember that I want to dedicate my life to making sure that that’s okay no matter where you live.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 29th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Restroom


Someone wrote…

I like being able to use the female restroom and not get clocked for being a male in a past life. I never take it for granted because I know others do not have it as easy as I do.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 27th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 1 comment »

The slightest alteration


Someone wrote…

It’s interesting how even the slightest alteration to one’s appearance can mean the difference between being read as male or female.

I recently purchased a small messenger bag to carry my phone, wallet, etc., and I am finding that I’m now being read as female. I suspect it’s because the strap goes right down the middle of my chest, accentuating my biological figure. It’s also not much bigger than a purse, but was advertised as a men’s bag. I usually pass as male about 90% of the time, but adding this bag to my ensemble has tilted the scales in the other direction. I feel compelled to get rid of it and continue putting things into my pockets.

I’m sad. I loved that bag. Any suggestions for bags that don’t divide one’s chest would be greatly appreciated. Sometimes backpacks are too bulky.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 19th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 7 comments »

Sight Seeing


Someone wrote…

For the first day ever, I sent a day out sight seeing and was never gendered female. It was a wonderful feeling.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 17th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Mirror


Someone wrote…

It’s not that I don’t like who I see in the mirror. It’s just not me.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 15th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 1 comment »

Question: Neutral dress clothes?


Harley asks…

I’m going to my cousin’s wedding soon, and since I’m agender, I’d like to find something fairly androgynous to wear.

Since I’m also DFAB, and have a somewhat feminine face, a suit or men’s dress shirt and tie would probably work alright. However, I would like to find a more androgynous alternative if at all possible.

Do gender-neutral dress clothes exist, and if so, where can I find them?

Please post your response in the comments below.

» Ask Genderfork «


Posted by on August 14th, 2014 at 08:00 am

questions | 4 comments »

Glitter and bow-ties


Someone wrote…

Some days I am all glitter and sparkles, and others I am all flannel and bow-ties.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 13th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 3 comments »

Bathrooms


Someone wrote…

I’ve always been comfortable using women’s bathrooms when there aren’t any gender neural ones around. It’s a few other people who get uncomfortable.

They look at my hair and clothes, superficial details about me as a person, and assume I’m a man using the wrong bathroom. Some even get aggressive and yell at me as if I’m a predator. I feel that they should notice my comfortable demeanor and realize that I’m not in the wrong bathroom.

It gets old having to explain to strangers that sometimes women look masculine, every time I have to use the bathroom but, on the bright side, their exposure to me is a lesson on gender. Eventually I won’t have to deal with women who think they know my anatomy more than I do.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 11th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Matches


Someone wrote…

When I have clothes and a style that matches where I am at with my gender I feel more available, open, and loving.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 9th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Expressions


Someone wrote…

I’m so nervous about expressing myself to my family and community. Most of my family understand binarily trans people just fine, and so do a fair number of people where I live, but a lot of people are prejudiced against them – how are they going to react to someone who’s some third gender?

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 7th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Pass


Someone wrote…

I feel like I pass the most on days when my gender hasn’t crossed my mind and therefore I am not trying to pass.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 5th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Groovy tights


Someone wrote…

As a trans person, I spend all my time trying to present as a guy. But lately, I long more and more to dress in skirts, with combat boots and groovy tights.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 3rd, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Lines and scales


Someone wrote…

I feel stuck between thinking that because I’m female-bodied, everything I do is inherently feminine because I use my body and myself to express and be who I am. But then I also think that most of how I express myself and feel would fall under a normatively masculine umbrella.

Where does one draw the line between masculine and feminine? What tips the scales? Is my gender even related to my body?

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on August 1st, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

Body positive


Someone wrote…

An unexpected benefit of starting an exercise routine to boost energy and combat anxiety: I’m starting to love my body for the first time in my life. My heart and lungs are getting stronger, and I’m proud of my little weight lifting muscles!

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 30th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Radiant and full of life.


Someone wrote…

I’ve had dreams where I was female, and I had long colorful hair, and I was radiant and full of life. It was amazing, really.

Most cis people take their gender for granted and might tell me, “you’re not missing anything,” but when you struggle with dysphoria the very idea of being who you are — inside and out — is like that tingly feeling you get when falling in love. It’s a place of peace and we just want to finally arrive.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 28th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Waking up.


Someone wrote…

There are days when I wake up and know I am a girl, and days when I wake up and know I am a boy. The majority of days though, I just know I’m me – regardless of what is or isn’t between my legs.

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 24th, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | Comment »

Comfort


Someone wrote…

I was getting really hung up on struggling with what’s true for me, what’s a product of societal programming, and the incessant binary thoughts of “wait if I’m not cis then I must be trans, right?” grinding away in my head. Then I got a piece of advice that almost instantly quieted it all down and helped it all make sense for me. I go back to it frequently.

“Stop thinking of it terms of gender and start thinking of it terms of comfort. Do the “women’s” clothes you wear make you feel comfortable? Then wear them!

Does looking more femme make you feel more comfortable some days more than others? Then look femme!

Same goes for your body, the way you talk, the way you move, the way you express yourself. It doesn’t have to be about any notion of gender binary. It can just simply be about physical manifestations of what makes you feel good.”

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 22nd, 2014 at 08:00 am

your voice | 2 comments »

How do I discourage being wrongly gendered without being confrontational?


Someone wrote…

I am an FTM. I work in the public school system. I applied to the job and was hired as male…I wear a name tag that clearly reads “MR.” I conform to many male stereotypes (I bind, I have short hair, I wear mens clothing exclusively) Oftentimes, however, I am either referred to with female pronouns among co-workers or they include my presence in terms like “ladies” referring to a group.

How do I discourage these types of experiences without being rude or confrontational?

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?


Posted by on July 21st, 2014 at 08:00 am

questions | 5 comments »

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