Paranoid.
Someone wrote…
I have a brilliant picture of me in drag— a blond wig, button-up shirt, tie, as guyish as a young teenager can go without someone asking some questions. And I want to post it here, because that’s the only look I wear that makes me feel beautiful. But I can’t, because I’m paranoid someone I know will stumble across it. So, for anyone who can post their picture here, I encourage you to do it, because I wish wish wish I could too.
What’s your experience?
Posted by julian on April 14th, 2010 at 08:00 am
Category: your voice 13 comments »
April 14th, 2010 at 8:50 am |
That’s a very brave thing for you to say…I feel the same way! I feel that as the days go by, this website is getting more and more popular, as is the idea of gender variance/ genderqueerness. So it’s more likely that someone who knows me will come across it. I’m too scared to fully express myself just yet…
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April 14th, 2010 at 10:05 am |
There’s no reason to rush into anything that makes you uncomfortable. Many/most of us, if not all of us, either have felt or still feel this way. It’s hard. Binary gender identification gets beaten into everyone from birth onward. We learn about gender before we learn about sexuality, gender variance is still less accepted than sexual variance, and sexual variance is barely tolerated, much less accepted.
Take all the time you need. For now, just be happy you’ve found a way to be that makes you feel beautiful. When you are ready, Genderfork will still be here, and we Genderfork fans will be overjoyed to meet you.
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April 14th, 2010 at 1:33 pm |
This is the exact same way I feel. I’m so worried that someone I know will see it..
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April 14th, 2010 at 4:25 pm |
I have a picture I keep on my facebook profile under private. It’s not the same, but it helps sometimes.
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April 15th, 2010 at 2:05 am |
The internet is a funny place. You never know where pictures might end up. Heck, 4chan could run off with them! So choices about what to post have to be made responsibly and I think you’re a very wise person for making a choice of your own.
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April 15th, 2010 at 5:29 am |
Theoretically, you should just say ‘screw it’ and post post post. However, if you feel not ready, or that there’s danger in doing it, then that’s understandable…
I believe tough that you should do whatever is in your power to be whoever you are.
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April 15th, 2010 at 8:03 pm |
Just remember folks: if someone sees it, they’ll have to explain *how* they saw it.
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April 15th, 2010 at 11:05 pm |
I can relate.
I don’t even dress how I want to, due to dear of being judged. :/
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April 16th, 2010 at 11:30 am |
hey folks,
Let’s, please, be careful about telling people what they “should” do. We are all different and what makes us feel safe about being who we are is different too.
~A
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April 17th, 2010 at 11:58 pm |
I just submitted a photo and had this exact thought. But i’m at the point where I almost don’t care now. I’m gonna come out to those last people eventually. If they stumble across it… just saves me trying to pick a good moment.
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April 20th, 2010 at 4:40 pm |
You’re lucky to have pictures in which you look beautiful. I’ve always felt myself entirely not photogenic. That’s why I was always the person with the camera – it’s a great thing to hide behind.
From some of us their inner beauty shines through, then there’s the rest of us that just look like Nora Batty.
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April 23rd, 2010 at 9:21 am |
Jessica – sometimes you just have to be bold enough to put out that first picture – you get compliments, then you sow more… for me at least, confidence is something that just snowballs, as it were.
But as I said up there, you have to feel safe and ready.
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April 23rd, 2010 at 9:23 am |
…or rather, you heave to feel ready for ‘danger’, if you don’t feel safe. I don’t think I’ve had many times where I’ve felt ‘safe’, but jumping out of my safe zone is just who I am.
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