Stops being a joke.

Someone wrote…

When will the day come when “guy in a dress” stops being a joke?

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?

Posted by on January 7th, 2010 at 08:00 am

Category: your voice 16 comments »

16 Responses to “Stops being a joke.”

  1. --Z--

    Unfortunately, probably only after frat boys stop using it as a joke.

    It’s quite unfair, since women in suits are generally unhassled by this sort of reaction. Probably because the hetero-normative male ego feels extremely threatened by anyone who doesn’t feel the need to cater to the same overblown macho posturing they do.


  2. sinclair

    I was JUST writing about this in a column called When Men Wear Skirts – – so I’m excited to see it mentioned like this here. will check back on the comments and see what folks say!


  3. Anonymous

    Gays started to win when they came out and said they were proud. It’s simply a numbers thing. “The personal is political” – the accumulation of each person’s choice defines the context.

    NB: the Gandhi stage after “laugh” is “fight”. But still – the only way out is through.


  4. Astra

    Depends on your surroundings, I’d think. One circle of my friends I’m in consider it a joke only if it’s frilly and silly looking, period.


  5. Lilybean

    The day you wear that dress and refuse to take sh** from anyone.



  6. Beth

    To Sinclair: I really liked your article. There was a link to another article posted here a couple weeks ago about parents letting their son wear dresses to school– did you catch that one? I think a lot of the changes in reclaiming masculinity are going to be made in the kids that are growing up now in a time where it’s easier to push gender boundaries at an early age.

    Maybe in 10 years or so “guy in a dress” will stop being a joke.


  7. Chase

    My mom gave me this beautiful black sleeveless dress with a high collar and a panel of sheer fabric going horizontally through the middle. It really compliments my male figure and I could imagine it looking better on a muscular or skinny male than on a curvy female.
    It’s just so strange to me that a dress could look so damn fine on a male, yet men are told they can’t wear dresses at all.


  8. Sarah

    Chase: three fucking cheers for your mom!!


  9. PJ

    The fact that this is still a “joke” makes me so angry. And when transwomen get called drag queens.


  10. Cassie

    I remember one day when one of the seniors at my high school just decided to show up in a dress one day. I didn’t think about it then, but now I am thoroughly impressed and pleased with the fact that, a) the school didn’t force him to change, and b) out of everyone who my friends and I talked about it with/heard talking about it, there were no demeaning comments. The comments were all about how much better he looked in the dress than a girl and how nice of a figure he had (with minimal stuffing in the boob area).

    Of course, that was when the school was a lot more liberal. My senior year (two or three years later, I believe), the school made it quite clear of how intolerant they were when we did Day of Silence. Not quite as much acceptance for the LGBT community then as the boy who wore the dress got. Sadly.

    And my current thought on both gender identity and sexual orientation is that society assumes too much. Society assumes that everyone is born either as a boy or a girl and society assumes that they’ll be comfortable being what they were born with and society assumes that everyone is straight.

    My thoughts are on how society should assume less in these areas and why it doesn’t.


  11. William

    Read this book to see that things are changing


  12. ovind

    OH MAN! I remember when I was in freshman (sophomore?) year of highschool, there was this kid named Nick that just showed up to school in a dress for no other reason than the fact that the dude looked fooooooine. IT WAS LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT, not him mind you, but the his “FUCK YEAH I’M RAWKIN A DRESS!!!!” attitude. He was this tall, gawky art/theatrekid with a terrible haircut and thick plastic rimmed glasses in the prettiest plaid print sundress and nobody really cared.

    Not sure if it was because he was a theatrekid (THOSE CRAZY THEATREKIDS WHAT WILL THEY DO NEXT) or if he was an artkid (THOSE CRAZY ARTKIDS WHAT WILL THEY DO NEXT) but aside from the few confused, halfhearted hecklers no one even blinked. It was just business as usual HEY YOU KIDS STOP SMOKING BEHIND THE BLEACHERS I WILL CALL YOUR PARENTS DON’T THINK I WONT DO IT KIDS THESE DAYS, SHEESH

    Moral of the story is: Dudes in dresses stopped being a joke at my school in the middle of suburbanhell/farmville PA six years ago. No it’s not everywhere, but it’s a start and how awesome is that?


  13. BamBam

    Aw, I would love to live to see the day when men are not required to live up to the macho demeanours expected of them, and are able to dress and behave in a manner befitting their inner personalities.

    Similarly, I’d love to see clothing no longer be gendered and everyone be able to freely wear whatever they like without having people say ‘why do you like to wear MEN’S clothes?’ or ‘dude, why are you in a dress?’

    I’m sick of this “man-masculine-suits” and “woman-feminine-skirts” nonsense.


  14. J

    I will believe in “male” and “female” clothing as soon as clothes gain the ability to have sex and reproduce.


  15. Lilybean

    One thing I find interesting… you’d think a dress – spacious and free – would be more suitable for a penis-bearer than more restrictive trousers/ pants.

    Just a thought.


  16. Milo



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