Awkward, wonderful, equivocal

Someone wrote…

…That awkward, wonderful, equivocal moment when you’re not sure if the cashier addressed you as “man” or “ma’am.”

What’s your experience?

And what are you thinking about gender right now?

Posted by on October 2nd, 2012 at 08:00 am

Category: your voice 7 comments »

7 Responses to “Awkward, wonderful, equivocal”

  1. Joss/Ames

    The best part is when you’re pretty sure the cashier didn’t know either…


  2. Sasha

    I swear i just had one of those a couple hours ago. Although i like to think they said “man,” i really dont know. I guess it’s awkward either way because “man” is too imformal/familiar, and “ma’am” would be inapropriate because i dont dress or act like a lady and im 15 years old. sometimes i just wish that gender wasnt such a big part of our language…

    good point, joss/ames, well said


  3. Wiley

    I LOVE IT WHEN THIS HAPPENS. Seriously…makes my day every time.


  4. Cat

    I’ve never had that happen to me, but I did enjoy it when I was at a workshop and the presenter wanted us to introduce ourselves and said, “So let’s start with this… um…. young lady.” The pause was enough to make me feel great.


  5. Jesse

    Ah, the days of Sir, ma’am. I am seldom confused for what I appear to be from the outside, but as to the inside…. anybody’s guess.


  6. Anonymous

    I honestly hate when this happens to me, because it leaves me confused on whether I need to call them out on this. It’s like being stunned by a blow.

    (I’m a trans man, btw.)


    Sasha replied:

    man i see how this could be a problem…. sucks for you. im genderqueer, so i dont correct people either way cuz i dont know what to say to them, they wouln’t understand. also i know what being ma’am’ed feels like… not only does it feel wrong, but as i explained in an earlier comment it’s not appropriate to call a 15-year old masculine-presenting person ma’am.


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