Question: Coming out genderfluid

Aelin asks…

I’m genderfluid and 15 but I’m in the process of coming out. I’ve come out to some of my close friends and my 11-year-old brother, but not my parents. My parents are supporters of the LGBT+ community, but don’t believe genderfluidity exists and is ultimately a form of gender-questioning.

I’m unsure how to come out to them, but as I’ll be living with them for a while longer, I feel somewhat uncomfortable keeping it from them. Any advice?

Please post your response in the comments below.

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Posted by on August 26th, 2015 at 08:00 am

Category: questions 2 comments »

2 Responses to “Question: Coming out genderfluid”

  1. Riley Alexandr

    Research. Lots of it. Not just “lol genderfluidity is ok” from Tumblr, like legitimate experiences people put out there.

    Make a petition like “reblog if genderfluid is a real identity”. This isn’t mandatory, but if the conversation goes sour, this could help.

    Find places where you can get stuff you’ll need, like binders and stuff. Save some money to at least 75% cover the cost of what you might need to buy. This shows dedication. Parents like that kind of thing.

    Write a respectful, well-worded letter to your parents that explains:
    – Your identity
    – Your needs (preferred name, pronouns, binders, clothes, etc)
    – That you are still their child, you love them, and you are gonna need some support but you understand that they’ll need time to get used to this

    Give them space. Give them the letter before you go to school – this gives them time to read it – and lightly bring it up when you come home that afternoon.

    Be prepared for questions. Lots. Of. Fricking. Questions

    Above all, remember that you have the support of hundreds of thousands of other genderfluid people in the world. We all love you, Aelin. Good luck x


  2. Matthew/Melisa

    Well, I think Riley pretty much covered it. But if you’re worried about the consequences, they aren’t goingg to throw you out of the house. Try making it as easy for them to understand as possible. Be prepared for those questions, like going through test runs with friends and your bro. Above all, don’t be taken aback if it comes as a shock to them. Even if we think it’s obvious, your parents may not. If they don’t acknowledge you coming out within a month or so, bring it up again.


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