This is a sewing blog I’ve been following, written by a man who’s been sewing for himself, his boyfriend, and his ‘cousin’ Cathy. In this particular entry he admits that he is himself Cathy, and he segues into a brilliant, casual, assured invitation to his mainstream sewing readership to consider gender deviance. He’s a superb sewist, and a smart, funny, talented blogger, and he’s encouraging people to think outside the lines. Plus he uses lots of vintage patterns! What more could you want?
Everyone I know has been really accepting towards the fact that I am ftM transsexual, but I think some of them have some internalized, subconsious transphobia. A few of my friends get randomly angry at me when the topic gender comes up, when my voice gets unstable or when I act, in their view, ‘macho’. I find it difficult to talk about this as they do not want to see themselves as remotely transphobic. Should I just drop the topic or is there a way to handle this without calling my friends transphobes?
My partner and I have been musing about one day having children. We’re having trouble figuring out what to do about family names, though. We’re both very genderqueer, and we plan to keep our own last names when we get married. We don’t like the idea of hyphenating, and when we tried to combine our names into a new last name the results we came up with sounded awful and absurd.
Are there any other options open to us? What would you recommend we do, or what would you do in our place?
Chris Crocker talks about both sides of himself and how something such as facial hair or clothing choice can change things. Most of the time we see him/her/or hir (whichever you prefer) dressed as a female with “distinctly feminine” qualities such as makeup, high heels etc but here he discusses how simply growing out his facial hair changed what he wore and even who acknowledged him.
What’s a culturally sensitive, easy-to-understand response to “Are you a boy or a girl?” that doesn’t completely erase your non-binary-IDed self?
I’m currently abroad in the Middle East, and I have no idea how to respond confidently to the taxi drivers, servers, etc., who ask me this on a regular basis. In the US I’m sure I’d just be like, “Does it *matter*?” but here I’m apprehensive that it’s a bigger deal than that, what with the strongly enforced gender segregation that seems to be a part of the culture. Even more than that, though, I think such a response would just confuse people.
Here’s the backstory: I work at a front desk. One of our customers had an androgynous appearance–“male” body, “femme” clothes, but their voice, body language, etc. did not give me the impression that ze was trans. I didn’t ask what pronoun ze preferred, because when another coworker referred to them as “he”, ze did not protest. Should I have asked anyway?
This zine is a collection of really amazing writing, drawing, and photography on masculine femininities and other paths of gender identity exploration. There are three editions so far, each with a slightly different character. I especially enjoyed reading about claiming femininity or femme identity from a trans-male or masculine identified place. But you’ll find that the zine explores other themes too. Many contributions speak subtly and honestly about how gender, including gender-nonconformity, is tinged with more potentially anxiety-provoking ideas about race and body-image, how one is seen by lovers, how one makes a living, etc.
I’m a genderforker working on a paper involving queer genders & menstruation. It is so difficult to find resources! Has anyone seen anything? A study? A little bit from a book (nonfiction or fiction)? Or maybe you’d be willing to share your story with me? I know that menstruating is a big deal for me because of how it conflicts with and sometimes confirms my gender ID. Does everyone else just deal with it and not give it much thought? What’s up?
You can feel free to email me at genderclear at gmail dot com if you have any comments you don’t want to share publicly.
Aiesu is a manga collection of short stories about intersexed individuals and their lives. All the stories have the characters making a safely ambiguous place for themselves in a highly gender binary world and it filled me with such warm, fuzzy feelings! Especially the story beginning at chapter 13 which is why I posted a link to that one. They’re all self-contained so it makes no difference where you start.
I am a female genderqueer of sorts with small breasts. I have no plan to go on T, and I seem to bounce back and forth between wanting big boobs and wanting a male chest. This changes day to day, even hour to hour.
I thought a good solution would be to get top surgery and get some breastforms for when I want them. But now that I’m looking more seriously into it (next year maybe) I’m getting a little freaked out… It’s only been in the past several years I’ve felt this way- I was totally fine with puberty, no problem.
I’m worried that maybe I’m idealizing the male and female forms- that I have unrealistic expectations of how I’ll look. How do I figure out my true feelings?
Quote from his website: “Scott Turner Schofield is a man who was a woman, a lesbian turned straight guy who is usually taken for a gay teenager. A former debutante and homecoming queen coming out in the Deep South, the work and the life on which it is based contain hilarious contradictions bordered with the possibility of terrifying consequences. Key to the work is a keen awareness of culture and self that maintains an accessible perspective even within the most particular of circumstances.”
I recently came across his work when he appeared on the reality TV dating show “Conveyor Belt of Love” and created an online buzz about “stealth” trans people on reality dating shows. His work is poignant and moving in its sheer honesty and vulnerability, but he avoids the confessional and depressing with a keen wit and impeccable comedic timing. Also check him out on YouTube touring with his book “2 Truths and a Lie.”
Almost everyday I walk into a restroom and get these horrible whispers as people assume I’ve walked into the wrong one.
I identify as androgynous and genderqueer, but being female-born, I use the women’s restroom, but I do look very much like a young boy.
Sometimes people confront me, sometimes they whisper and giggle on their way out, and sometimes they alert the faculty and then someone comes in and yells “Is there a boy in here?”
It has gotten to the point where it is a source of anxiety for me to walk into a restroom, especially in a place where the people don’t know me. What should I do? I could use some help!
This is a fashion site about queering “men’s” fashion. There are videos and columns about tying ties, buttoning buttons, doing hair…there are maps showing you where to find things, that you can add to. DapperQ is about opening up “men’s” fashion to multiple identities, so it isn’t just about passing either. Its about filling the void… the “dearth of information for those of us simply dressing to fight the good fight each day.”
